如何与人交流：更好的沟通技巧

大家知道如何能更好地更别人沟通吗,以下有一些小tips给大家.

Step 1: Use open-ended questions

第一：提些开放性的问题 For conversation to flow well, it's important to ask open questions, these often start with ‘how', ‘when', ‘why' etc. An open question is something like: "What sort of things do you do in your spare time?" This really gets the conversation flowing. Try to avoid asking closed questions. These are questions that can be answered with yes or no answer, such as: "Do you like films?" Closed questions tend to kill the conversation.

为使谈话内容充实，提些开放性的问题是很重要的，比如以“如何”，“什么时候”，“为什么”等词语开头的句子。以开放性的问题开始聊天，比如：“你平时空余时间都做些什么?”这种问题会引出更多话题。切忌提出那些用是或不是就可回答的封闭式的问题，如：“你喜欢看电影么?”封闭式问题会使双方陷入没话说的窘境。

Step 2: Active Listening People speak at 100 to 175 words per minute (WPM), but they can listen intelligently at up to 300 words per minute. Since only a part of our mind is paying attention, it is easy to go into mind drift - thinking about other things while listening to someone. The cure for this is active listening - which involves listening with a purpose. It may be to gain information, obtain directions, understand others, solve problems, share interest, see how another person feels, show support, etc. It's also important to give feedback to show yourself and the other person that you've understood what they've said. Do this by summarising and repeating what you heard.

第二：做个积极的倾听者 人们每分钟只能说100到175个字，但是却可以准确地听辨出300个字。但因为在倾听时大脑中只有一部分在运转，所以很容易走神—听对方讲话的同时却想着其他的东西。积极倾听是解决这种问题的有效方法—有目的的去倾听。比如为了听取信息，得到指令，理解他人，解决问题，分享趣事，感受他人，提供帮助而倾听。倾听后的回复也很重要，这能让对方知道到你理解了他们所说的话。可以通过总结和重复听到的话来回复他人。

Step 3: Create a 'cocoon' If you're finding it particularly difficult to concentrate on what someone is saying, try to imagine a “cocoon” around you and the person you're listening to. Imagine that the cocoon is blocking out all outside distractions, so you can really focus on what they're saying. Try repeating their words mentally as they say it - this will reinforce their message and help you control mind drift.

第三：营造自己的聊天“密室”如果你感到无法集中精神关注他人所说，试着营造一间“小密室”，里面有你和你聊天的对象。想象着这间密室是与世隔绝的，没有那些让你分心的事物，你就可以专心于聊天的内容了。在心里默念对方所说的词语—从而强化信息，避免走神。

Step 4: Engage with the other person When someone is trying to get your attention, or engage you in conversation don't turn your back on them, or answer over your shoulder. Instead, turn and face them, engage with them. Good communication is when you really engage. When you are talking to people observe your body language and your tone of voice. Remember to use open strong gestures, look people in the eye and smile when you talk unless you are complaining about something.

第四：注意社交礼仪，专心与他人交谈 当别人想引起你的注意，或有兴趣与你长谈，不要回避，也不要转着头回答。相反的，你应该转过身去，面对他们进行交谈。只有专心于交流，才能更好的沟通理解。讲话时注意肢体语言和声调，以坚定自信的姿态，直视对方，除非是在抱怨投诉，记得要面带微笑。

Step 5: Assumptions Don't assume you know the other person's thoughts and feelings. Learn to identify when you do this. It normally occurs when the facts aren't present to support your belief, so always check with the other person what they mean when they say something.

第五：不要想当然 不要自以为了解他人的想法和感受。要学会通过交流去证实。很多事情我们常常找不到足够的事实去证明自己的猜想，所以要向对方核实他们所说的话的真实含义。

Step 6: Antagonistic sentences If you need to talk to someone about a difficult topic then avoid using sentences like “You should know me better”, “Why are you trying to upset me?”, “You've never understood me”, “I thought we were going to enjoy ourselves”. These are antagonistic sentences, and are not productive in any way and will just ensure there is a conflict.

第六：避免敌对性语句 如果你需要同对方探讨一些敏感问题，切忌使用敌对性语句，比如：“你该更好地了解我啊”，“为什么要让我伤心”，“你从不理解我”，“我原以为我们会开心的”。这些敌对攻击的语句对谈话没有推进作用，只会引起冲突。