如果老板任人唯亲 你该如何是好

Karl Moore remembers the moment he fell out of favour with his boss.

卡尔•摩尔(Karl Moore)还记得他失去老板宠信的那段日子。

He was working as a manager at IBM in Toronto when a new person joined his department. Up until then Moore had been part of his boss’s “favoured inside circle” — but suddenly everything changed. The transferred employee became his boss’s new right-hand person, the outcome of brutal office politics.

当他在多伦多担任IBM的管理人员时，一个新人加入了他的部门。在此之前，摩尔一直都是老板的心腹之人——但突然之间，一切都改变了。经过残酷的办公室政治斗争之后，刚调过来的那个人成了老板最新的左膀右臂。

“Good news for the team but I was soon put on the bench,” said Moore, now a professor at McGill University’s Desautels Faculty of Management in Montreal, Canada. It certainly wasn’t a fun experience — and it definitely made his job harder, he said.

“这对团队来说是个好消息，但我很快就坐上了冷板凳。”摩尔说，他目前在加拿大蒙特利尔的麦吉尔大学索特管理学院担任教授。他表示，那肯定不是一段愉快的经历——显然也加大了他的工作难度。

If your boss plays favourites — but you’re not one of them — is there anything you can do about it? And should you even care if you're never flavour of the month? After all, nobody likes a sycophant.

如果你的老板任人唯亲——但你却不是他的亲信——是否可以采取什么应对方案呢？如果你始终没有成为老板的心腹，又是否应该在意呢？毕竟，没有人喜欢阿谀奉承。

Moore eventually made it back to being one of the favoured few. But it took some time waiting for “the new person’s halo to diminish a bit”. More importantly, Moore was able to change the tide after he delivered on a couple of key agenda items for his boss that were central to his success. “After about a year, once again the sun shone upon me,” he said.

摩尔最终重新成为了老板的心腹。但要等待“新人的光环消失”，仍然需要一些时间。摩尔之所以能够扭转局势，更重要的在于他帮助老板实现了几个对其成功至关重要的目标。“大约过了一年，我又再次成了老板的亲信。”他说。

Falling out of favour for no good reason is a difficult turn to take. But, it doesn’t have to be permanent. Here’s what you can do.

在没有正当理由的情况下失宠是一件令人很难接受的事情。但这未必会一直持续下去。你可以通过下面的方式化解危机。

Deliver

帮老板实现目标

Think about exactly what your boss needs to succeed and look good to his bosses. Find a way to help make it happen.

仔细思考你的老板需要借助哪些因素才能获得成功，并认真为他着想，想方设法帮助他成功。

“One of the things that makes virtually all bosses smile on us is if we help them deliver on one of the top items on their agenda for the year,” said Moore. “If you can better understand your boss’s top three agenda items and help them achieve one of those, they will tend to nudge you toward the favourites category.”

“如果能帮助老板实现他们的重要年度目标，几乎所有的老板都会欣赏你。”摩尔说，“如果你能更好地理解老板的三大重要目标，并帮助他们实现其中的一个，你往往就会成为他们的心腹之人。”

Sometimes it can be as simple as asking about priorities and then helping to make sure that at least one of them comes to fruition, said Moore.

摩尔表示，有时候只需要直接向老板询问他们最看重哪些事情即可，然后至少帮助他们实现其中的一项。

Boss as customer

把老板当成客户

For Andrew Wittman, a former marine, police officer, and federal agent, the solution is to change your perspective.

对于曾经当过海军陆战队士兵、警察和联邦探员的安德鲁•维特曼(Andrew Wittman)来说，解决办法是改变自己的视角。

“No matter where you work or for whom, when you approach work from the perspective that says, ‘My boss is not my boss; he or she is my customer or client’, everything changes,” said Wittman, managing partner of South Carolina-based leadership consultancy Mental Toughness Training Center. “You’ll instantly have all the power and control. You are merely leasing your services to the company. They are your client and you give them great customer service.”

“无论你为谁工作，如果你的工作视角变成‘老板不是老板，而是我的客户’，一切都会改变。”维特曼说，他目前在南卡罗来纳的领导力咨询公司Mental Toughness Training Center担任管理合伙人，“你会立刻拥有所有的能力和控制力。你不只是将自己的服务出租给公司。他们还是你的客户，你需要为他们提供一流的客户服务。”

It’s important not to start feeling bad about yourself — or letting the idea of not being a favourite take over your thoughts, said Wittman. Otherwise, that’s all you will think about and you’ll lose out on opportunities to get ahead.

维特曼认为，关键是不要气馁——也不要让‘老板不器重我’这样的观念占据你的思维。否则，你就会满脑子只想着这件事情，从而失去继续前进的机会。

“If you focus on making your boss a satisfied customer and making she or he look great to the higher ups, which will lead to being a ‘favourite’, your brain will sift through all the facts and data and confirm you are a favourite,” said Wittman. As a result, you’ll be less critical, be able to focus on solving problems more intently and act in ways that will naturally make the boss happy.

“如果你集中精力把老板变成一个满意的客户，并让她或他在上级面前表现出色，使之成为上级的‘心腹’，你的大脑就会对所有事实和数据进行筛选，并证明你才是老板的亲信。”维特曼说。这样一来，你就会少一些批判，从而集中精力解决问题，通过更加自然的方式取悦老板。

The inner circle

左膀右臂

Just because your boss doesn’t seem to like you doesn’t automatically mean other people won’t.

如果只是老板不喜欢你，未必意味着其他人也不喜欢你。

“Try to get in good with the people who are the boss's favourites,” said New York-based Vicky Oliver, author of Bad Bosses, Crazy Coworkers & Other Office Idiots. “Sometimes if a boss's pet raves about you, it can help ease the friction.”

“努力跟老板的亲信搞好关系，”《坏老板、疯同事和办公室里的其他傻瓜》(Bad Bosses, Crazy Coworkers & Other Office Idiots)一书的作者维基•奥利佛(Vicky Oliver)说，“有的时候，如果老板的心腹喜欢你，也有助于减少摩擦。”

And always strive to be a good team player. “If the crowd likes you, it can help sway the boss's opinion,” she said.

不仅如此，还要时刻努力成为优秀的团队成员。“如果大家喜欢你，也有助于影响老板的观念。”她说。

A fine line

把握尺度

Don’t go overboard fawning on your boss, thereby alienating yourself from your colleagues or making them resent you. For instance, if your boss tells a lame joke and you laugh louder than everyone else, that is just outright brown nosing, according to Oliver.

不要过分奉承老板，并因此疏远了同事，导致你变成别人憎恨的对象。例如，奥利佛表示，如果你的老板讲了一个蹩脚的笑话，而你的笑声比别人都大，那就是公然拍马屁。

“But if you come in with a solution to a problem that no one else has considered, that is simply shining on your own merit,” she said. And, spread the love when you do: “If you laud others on the team for helping you arrive at a solution, that is bound to score points with the boss and with your teammates.”

“但如果你针对一个问题给出了别人都没想到的解决方案，那就只是展示自己的优点。”她说。另外，还应该尽量与人为善：“如果你称赞团队里的其他人帮助自己找到了解决方案，那就肯定能得到老板和同事的认可。”

Keep your options open

保持自由身

Rare these days is a boss — or subordinate — who sticks around for life. So, luckily you are unlikely to be wedded to this person for eternity.

当今社会，能够一生保持上下属关系的人少之又少。所以，你应该也不太可能与此人共事一辈子。

You probably won’t like working for someone who plays favourites, even if you become the flavour of the month. But don’t let yourself fall into a workplace pit of despair over it. Instead, continue working hard and behaving professionally and show that you care about the team, company, and clients.

你可能并不想为一个任人唯亲的人工作，即使你自己恰恰就是他的心腹之人。不要让自己因此丧失信息，反而应该努力工作，尽量表现得专业一些，展示出自己对团队、公司和客户的关心。

“At the same time, you should be working your way into a different position where the boss is a better one and so you can focus more on being great at your job and growing toward your next promotion,” said Moore.

“与此同时，还应该摆正心态，更加认可自己的老板。这样一来，你就可以把更多精力集中在工作上，并努力寻求下一次的晋升。”摩尔说。