英语幽默简短小故事

英语幽默故事简短，内容诙谐幽默，情节生动有趣。今天小编整理了一些英语小故事，希望对大家喜欢。

英语幽默小故事：岳母

A big-game hunter went on safari with his wife and mother-in-law. One evening, while still deep in the jungle, the Mrs awoke to find her mother gone. Rushing to her husband, she insisted on them both trying to find her mother.

一位职业猎人带着妻子和岳母一块去游猎。一个傍晚，丛林深处，夫人突然发现母亲不见了。她坚持两个人都要努力去找到母亲。

The hunter picked up his rifle, took a swig of whiskey, and started to look for her. In a clearing not far from the camp, they came upon a chilling sight: the mother-in-law was backed up against a thick, impenetrable bush, and a large male lion stood facing her.

猎人拿起了他的来福，喝了一大口威士忌，开始找人。在营地不远处，他们看到了一个令人震惊的地方：岳母背对着一大丛灌木，一只雄狮正看着她。

The wife cried, "What are we going to do?"

夫人哭道：“我们该怎么办?”

"Nothing," said the hunter husband. "The lion got himself into this mess, let him get himself out of it."

“没什么”，猎人丈夫说道，“狮子自己走进这么乱的地方的，让他自己出来吧。”

英语幽默小故事"Golfing with cows

A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat.

一个男人摇摇晃晃地走进了急诊室，两个眼睛是青的，脖子上有明显的五指印。

Naturally the doctor asks him what happened. "Well, it was like this," said the man. "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows.

医生问他发生了什么。“额，是这样的，”这个人说。“我和我老婆来了几局高尔夫，她把球打到一个牛群里。”

"We went to look for it and while I was rooting around, I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end.

“我们去找这个球，我四下搜索，发现一头牛的屁股后面有个白色的东西。”

"I walked over and lifted up the tail and sure enough, there was my wife's golf ball -- stuck right in the middle of the cow's butt. That's when I made my mistake."

“我走过去，举起了它的尾巴想看清楚，我老婆的球就卡在牛的屁股中间。然后我犯了一个错误。”

"What did you do?" asks the doctor.

“你干嘛了?”医生问。

"Well, I lifted the tail and yelled to my wife, 'Hey, this looks like yours!'"

“额，我举起了牛的尾巴，对我老婆喊道，'这个好像是你的!'”

　英语幽默小故事：Hen House

The priest in a small Irish village was very fond of the chickens he kept in the hen house out the back of the parish rectory. He had a cock rooster and about ten hens.

在一个小小的爱尔兰村庄中，牧师非常地喜爱鸡舍中的小鸡。鸡舍位于教区后面，里面有一只公鸡，十只母鸡。

One Saturday night the cock rooster was missing and the priest suspected that it was because cock fights were being held in the village. So he decided to do something about it at church the next morning.

然而，公鸡在一个星期六的晚上不见了，牧师怀疑可能是因为村里举办了斗鸡比赛。他谋划在第二天早晨去教堂做些事情。

At Mass, he asked the congregation, "Has anybody got a cock?" All the men stood up.

当着大家的面，他问道：“谁有一只公鸡吗?”所有的男人都站了起来。

"No, No," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock?" All the women stood up.

“不是的，”他说，“我不是那个意思，有谁见到过一只公鸡吗?”所有的女人都站了起来。

"No, No," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock that doesn't belong to them?" Half the women stood up.

“不是的!”他说，“我不是那个意思。有谁见过一只不属于自己的公鸡吗?”半数的女人站了起来。

"No, No," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen my cock?" All the altar boys stood up.

“不是的。”他说，“我也不是那个意思。有谁见过我的公鸡吗?”所有的侍者男孩都站了起来。