大学英语小笑话

笑话能够折射出社会生活中的方方面面,因为笑话是人们从平常生活中创造出来的。小编精心收集了大学幽默英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习!

　　大学幽默英语小笑话篇1

Little Jack is very fond of sweetmeats, and he has been forbidden to ask for dessert. Theother day, there was a grand dinner and they forgot to serve the poor little fellow. Jack wasmuch affected, but as he is very obedient, he remained silent.

"Mary, "said the father to the maid-servant, "pass me a plate."

"Won't you have mine, papa?" cried little Jack, "It is very clean!"

小杰克

小杰克非常爱吃甜食， 他的父母禁止他再吃甜点心。有一天，在一个盛大的宴会上，人们忘了照顾这个可怜的小家伙。杰克非常不自然，但他很听话，一直没吭声。

这时，杰克的父亲对女仆说：“玛丽，给我一个盘子。”

小杰克大声说道：“爸爸，要不要我的盘子，它上面一点东西也没有，　　非常干净!”

　　大学幽默英语小笑话篇2

A couple walking in the park noticed a young man and woman

siting on a bench, passionately kissing.

"Why don't you do that?" said the wife.

"Honey," replied her husband, "I don't even know that woman!"

我又不认识那个女人

一对在公园散步的夫妇注意到坐在长凳上的那对年轻男女正在热烈地接吻。

“为什么你不能那样做呢?”妻子说。

“亲爱的，”她丈夫回答，“我又不认识那个女人!”

　　大学幽默英语小笑话篇3

The boy's clothing shop was giving away balloons to customers' children. One little fellowasked if he might have two.

"Sorry," the clerk said,"but we give only one balloon to each child.

Do you have a brother at home?"

The youngster was always truthful , but he wanted another balloon badly. "No." he repliedregretfully,"but my sister does, and I'd like one for him."

他想要两只气球。

儿童服装店正在向顾客的孩子们赠送气球。其中一个小男孩问是否能够得到两只气球。

“对不起，”售货员说，“我们只赠给每个孩子一只气球，你家里有弟弟吗?”

小家伙一贯很诚实，可他特别想再要一只气球。“没有”，他遗憾地说，“可我姐姐有个弟弟，我想给他要一只。”

　　大学幽默英语小笑话篇4

A teacher was asking a student a lot of questions, but the student couldn't answer any ofthem. The teacher then decided to ask him some very easy questions so that he could get afew right.

"What was Bunker Hill?"she said.

The student thought for some time and then answered, "An airport?"

"No, it was a battle," the teacher said, she was getting a little angry now, but she was tryingnot to show she asked, "Who was the first president of the United States?"

The student thought for a long time, but didn't say anything. Then the teacher got veryangry and shouted, "George Washington!"

The student got up and began to walk towards his seat.

"Come back!" the teacher said. "I didn't tell you to go."

"Oh, I'm sorry," the student said. "I thought you called the next student."

第一位总统

老师向一位学生提出很多问题，可是这位学生却一问三不知。

老师只好换一些极其简单的问题，这样学生也许能答对几个题。

“邦克山是什么?”老师问。

学生想了一会儿，然后答道：“飞机场。”

“不对，那是一场战役，”老师说，她有些恼火了，但还是努力克制着不流露出来，接着她又问道，“谁是美国第一位总统?”

学生想了许多，可还是一语不发。

老师终于怒不可遏，大声喊道，“乔治·华盛顿!”

学生站起来开始朝自己座位走去。

“回来”老师说，“我没让你离开。”

“噢，真抱歉，”学生说。“我还以为您在叫下一位学生呢。”

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