长一点的初一英语笑话

抑郁症一般是是由心理障碍造成的，心里闭塞，但人们一看笑话，经常开怀大笑，这时病就会好了。本文是长一点的初一英语笑话，希望对大家有帮助!

　　长一点的初一英语笑话：Suddenly

Joe the lawyer died suddenly at the age of 45.

He got to the gates of Heaven.

The angel standing there said, "We've been waiting a long time for you."

"What do you mean," he replied. "I'm only 45, in the prime of my life. Why did I have to die now?"

"45? You're not 45, you're 82," replied the angel.

"Wait a minute. If you think I'm 82 then you have the wrong guy. I'm only 45. I can show you my birth certificate."

"Hold on. Let me go check," said the angel and disappeared inside. After a few minutes the angel returned.

"Sorry, but by our records you are 82. I checked all the hours you have billed your clients, and you have to be 82..."

　　长一点的初一英语笑话：4 Doctors

Four surgeons were taking a coffee break and were discussing their work.

The first said, "I think accountants are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is numbered."

The second said, "I think librarians are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is in alphabetical order."

The third said, "I like to operate on electricians. You open them up and everything inside is color-coded."

The fourth one said, "I like to operate on lawyers. They're heartless, spineless, gutless, and their heads and their asses are interchangeable."

　　长一点的初一英语笑话：No matter what

A man who was to be investigated by the Inland Revenue, asked his accountant for advice on what to wear.

"Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let him think you are a pauper." the accountant replied.

Then he asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite advice.

"Do not let them intimidate you. Wear your most elegant suit and tie."

Confused, the man asked a friend, told him of the conflicting advice, and aked what he should do.

"Let me tell you a story," replied his friend.

"A woman, about to be married, asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night and was told 'Wear a heavy, long, flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck.'

When she asked her best friend, she was told 'Wear your most sexy negligee, with a v-neck right down to your navel'."

The man said "What does all this have to do with my problem with the IR?"

His friend replied, "No matter what you wear, you are going to get screwed."

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