父母用四招帮助大学毕业的子女找到工作大纲
Dear Annie: Now that it's 2014, my son will be graduating from college in just a few months, and I have to admit I'm a little worried. He's gotten good grades as a finance major with a minor in business, which I think makes him pretty marketable. He's also done a couple of internships, one with a big-name company and one with a startup, but neither has yet offered him a regular full-time job.
亲爱的安妮：再过几个月，我儿子就要大学毕业了。说实话，我现在对他有一点儿担心。他在学校主修金融学，辅修商科，成绩优异，我觉得他在求职市场上会很有竞争力。他曾做过几份实习，既有著名的大公司，也有初创公司，但到现在还没有一家公司给他一份全职工作。
I know the job market is still pretty weak, and although I hate to think of myself as the dreaded "helicopter parent" always hovering nearby, I still think he could use some help. My husband and I are both well-connected in our respective fields, so should we be introducing our son to people who might know of job openings, or is that a bad idea? What do you and your readers recommend? ------ Minnesota Mom
我知道，现在工作很不好找，虽然我不想变成可怕的“直升机父母”，整天形影不离、喋喋不休地问长问短。但我觉得，他也许需要我的帮助。我和孩子爸爸在各自的工作领域内人脉很广，我们是否应该托熟人介绍些工作机会给儿子？这是不是个好办法？你和你的读者有什么建议吗？——一位来自明尼苏达州的母亲。
DeLong should know. He has a daughter who's a junior in college, but, more to the point, he's a fellow at MIT's Age Lab and the author of a new book called Graduate to a Great Job: Make Your College Degree Pay Off in Today's Market. You might find it useful, since it has a couple of chapters just for parents of new grads.
亲爱的明尼苏达州母亲：你的想法一点儿都没错（我们稍后就会谈原因），而且除非你的“帮忙”阻碍了他的成长，否则，你就不是“直升机父母”。“找工作本来就是孩子们的事，你不应插手，”戴维•德朗说。“另一方面，父母们十分清楚求职之路上的竞争有多激烈，而象牙塔中的学生们却知之甚少。”德朗很有发言权，他的女儿正在读大学三年级，但是他确切的身份是麻省理工学院年代实验室（Age Lab）的职员，也是《毕业不失业：怎样在求职大军中脱颖而出》（Graduate to a Great Job: Make Your College Degree Pay Off in Today's Market）一书的作者。这本书中有几个章节正是专为应届毕业生的父母所写，对你来说或许会有帮助。
It's certainly true that the class of 2014 will step into a rocky job market. Unemployment among U.S. young people ages 18 to 29 is stuck at about 16%, and underemployment in the same age group -- that is, working at a job that doesn't call for a four-year degree -- stands at roughly half.
的确，2014年毕业的应届生马上就要加入浩浩荡荡的求职者大军了。在美国，18至29岁之间年轻人的失业率高达16%，而在无需本科文凭的工作中，同样年龄段年轻人的失业率接近50%。
Moreover, although layoffs in December fell by about 3% year to year, to their lowest level since 2000, according to Chicago outplacement firm Challenger Gray & Christmas, finance jobs are not thick on the ground: The financial industry lost hundreds of thousands of jobs -- more than 80,000 in New York City alone -- in 2013, ironically due to an economic recovery that has drastically reduced the need for people who specialize in foreclosures and rewriting troubled loans. All of those people have had to go somewhere, and your son is competing against them, as well as against many other seasoned finance mavens.
根据芝加哥职业介绍机构Challenger, Gray & Christmas的报告显示，虽然2013年12月的企业裁员人数同比下降了3%，创下了自2000年以来的新低，但金融类的工作机会却并不是那么好找。整个2013年，金融行业减少了成千上万个职位，仅纽约市就减少了8万个岗位。讽刺的是，由于经济复苏，市场对擅长于止赎或冲销不良贷款专业人士的需求大幅下降，而他们总归是要找一份工作。你儿子除了要与这些人竞争之外，也还会面对许多经验丰富的金融从业人员。
Still, jobs do exist, of course: In researching his book, DeLong interviewed 35 recent college grads from 20 different schools (all "good" but none Ivy League), who have succeeded at finding interesting full-time work, sometimes with a boost from their mom and dads' connections. "Every parent-child relationship is different, naturally," DeLong says. "Some kids want nothing to do with any kind of help from their folks. Others are counting on it."
不过，工作机会总是有的。德朗曾做过一项调查，他访问了从20所不同学校（都是不错的学校但并非常春藤名校）毕业的35位应届毕业生，他们都成功地找到了不错的全职工作，有些人的确也借助了父母的人脉关系。“父母与孩子的关系天然地都各不相同，”德朗说。“有些孩子根本不会从父母哪儿得到任何帮助，而有些孩子却完全依赖父母。”
The first thing many parents have to do, he adds, is come to terms with whatever ambivalence they may harbor about their offspring's leaving home for good. "In all the interviews I did, the parents had mixed feelings. Some of them really wanted the kid to come home for the summer, or even for much longer," he observes. Assuming you've conquered that, here are four steps you can take to help:
他接着说，许多父母首先要做的就是，克服舍不得孩子离开家的矛盾心理。在我所做的全部访问中，父母对孩子离家都有一种复杂的情绪。有些父母的确想让孩子回家过暑假，甚至希望他们能待得更久，”他说道。假设你已经克服这种矛盾心理，以下四个步骤将会对你有所帮助：1. If possible, set up informational interviews. DeLong likes your idea of introducing your son to some of the people you (and your husband) know professionally. "Informational interviews, where someone meets with a seasoned person in a given field to find out what the various career paths are and how to get from A to B, are a great tool for any job hunter, but especially for new grads," he says. "Parents can be a gold mine of introductions to colleagues, clients, or other people with real-world insights that kids can really use."
1. 如果可能的话，帮他们联系信息性面试。德郎会比较认同你把儿子介绍给你（或丈夫）所认识的职场人士的想法。“信息性面试就是让他们与某个特定领域中的经验丰富人士交流，以确定不同的职业发展路径，以及了解如何取得职业晋升。这对于求职者来说是个十分有用的工具，特别是应届毕业生，”他说。“父母如果能把同事、客户等职业人士介绍给孩子，分享对他们有益的社会经验，那么对孩子来说，父母就无异于一个金矿。”
2. Encourage your child to develop a focus. Those informational interviews should help with this, as should reading some company websites and studying up on current trends in a given industry. "Employers tell me that most entry-level applicants have only a vague idea, if that, of what they want to do or what skills they bring," DeLong says. New grads often overlook, for instance, the link between team leadership honed in college sports or other activities and employers who are looking for those skills. You can help by pointing out the abilities and experience your son has to offer that companies want -- and that he may be overlooking.
2. 鼓励孩子逐渐明确想法。给孩子们提供信息化面试的好处很多，因为他们需要阅读公司的网页，了解某一行业的发展趋势。“雇主们告诉我，初级申请者仅对未来所从事的工作或是所需要的技能只有很模糊的概念，”德郎说。比如，应届毕业生常常忽视在大学比赛或活动中所锻炼出来的团队领导力与需要这些技能的雇主之间的联系。你可以帮助他了解他所具备的哪些能力和经验是招聘公司所需要的，而他说不定忽略了这一点。
3. Lend a hand with preparing for interviews. "New grads almost always need help with how to act and what to say in a job interview, either from you or from the campus career center or some other experienced source," DeLong says, adding that "interviews are more complicated now than they used to be, with many employers now depending on phone screens and Skype meetings, both of which call for different approaches."
3. 帮助他们准备面试。“面试时如何应对或应答？每个应届毕业生都需要得到这方面的指导和帮助，无论这种指导是来自你或是学校职业介绍中心还是其他经验人士，”德郎说。“如今面试的难度与以前相比早已不可同日而语，现在许多雇主们都依赖于电话面试或网络视频面试，这些都需要不同的应对技巧。”而同时，他说：“还要确保他们从思想上做好准备：在找到工作之前需要经历海量的面试。”
4. Steer him or her clear of the "passion hoax." DeLong considers this so important that he devoted a whole chapter of his book to it. "The larger society, or sometimes even parents themselves, too often encourage kids to 'do what you love' or 'find your bliss,'" he says. "But what if your bliss is the current equivalent of the buggy-whip business?"
4. 引导他们不要 “被兴趣所蒙蔽”。德朗非常重视这一点，他的书中有一整个章节都是在探讨这个问题。“整个社会，有时是甚至是父母都会鼓励孩子们‘做自己喜欢的事’或是‘找到自己的兴趣所在’，但如果你的兴趣早已跟不上时代怎么办？”
By his lights, a valuable (and difficult) part of parents' role is being supportive while still acting as a reality check. "Encourage new grads to learn about what industries are growing now and which ones aren't, and where the opportunities are likely to be in the future," he might also mention that "the point right now is to start somewhere, without worrying too much about whether it's the ideal job," DeLong adds. "Especially at the outset of a career, even a job you don't like will teach you a lot."
在他看来，在应届生子女求职过程中，父母所能发挥的最有价值（同时也是困难）的作用就是既要做到“辅助”，同时也要帮助他们认清现实。“家长们应该鼓励应届毕业生子女去了解哪些行业在蓬勃发展，哪些行业已日薄西山，同时还要判断未来的趋势和机会，”他说。你最好还要告诉他们“当下最重要的便是着手开始做一份工作，不要过于在意这份工作是否是自己的‘理想职业’，”德朗补充说。“在职业生涯的初期，哪怕是一份你并不喜欢的工作也能让你获益匪浅。”
What if your child is going into, say, drama, film, or some other field where lots of other talented people are parking cars or waiting tables? "Of course, a few of those people do get their big break," he notes. "But parents need to make sure kids understand the likely consequences of any choice they make now."
如果你的孩子在戏剧、电影这些行业，或者说是那些拿着大学文凭却只能做泊车或服务员的行业，你该怎么办？“这些行业中当然也有出类拔萃的人，”他说。“但身为父母，你也必须确保自己的孩子了解，他们现在所做的选择会对自己的未来产生怎样的影响。”
Good luck.
祝你好运。
