写给女人的幸福忠告:七种美丽涵养,帮你重塑自我(图)
Regularly engage in time travel. Often the best way to solve a problem is to have a conversation with your future self. How do you do this without bending the space-time continuum? It’s simple, really. Have a seat in your favorite chair and close your eyes. Now imagine walking into a bare room, with plain white walls with a small table and two folding chairs facing across from each other. Sit down in the chair closest to you. Now, in walks your future self 10 years from now. S/he sits across from you and explains that s/he’s there to answer whatever questions you have about the problems you’re facing. Go ahead and begin firing. Ask him/her whatever you want and take advantage of a more experienced version of you.
1、自己解困
通常，解决问题的最佳办法是：不如向未来的你自己倾述、求助。可世间并无时空隧道啊，那又如何才能办得到呢？这做起来其实很简单。舒舒服服地坐在一把椅子里，闭上双眼，想象你走进了一个房间，除了白色的粉墙外没有任何装饰，只有一张桌子和两把隔桌对置的折椅。在靠你身边的椅子坐下来，十年后的你自己与你的交谈就这样开始了。他（或她）就坐在你的对面，一定是有问必答。那你就敞开心扉，与他（或她）促膝长谈吧。有疑难只管问，然后采纳答案中比较成熟的优化方案。
Before you act, hold back. You would think that immediate, unmitigated action is best. Act quick! Buy now! Hurry before it’s too late! These seem to be the cultural beliefs we’re imprinted with. But is acting quickly really better? I think sometimes the opposite is better. Think about what you want, but wait to act. Just spend ten minutes thinking about what you want to create and allow yourself to feel what it will be like to take action. I think you’ll find when you build anticipation like this, the quality of your action will improve.
2、三思而行
你或许认为“雷厉风行，只争朝夕”是最好的办事风格吧。马上！现在！立即！要不就太晚了！这类观念似乎已在我们的文化中打下了深深的烙印。然而，雷厉风行就一定会捷足先登吗？依我看，有时倒是适得其反。所谓“三思而后行”，就是让你在付诸行动之前花上十来分钟把要做的事通盘考虑一下，并预期一下事态的走向和结果。我想，如果你预先做了这类功课的话，将会发现办事的效果有了质的飞跃。
Ignore and doubt yourself. Sometimes listening to yourself and getting in touch with your intuition is important. But what if you don’t like what you have to say to yourself? What if you have patterns of thought that aren’t serving you? Sometimes it’s better to allow them to be there and ignore them, rather than trying to push them out. Other times, it’s even important to doubt yourself… that is, doubt what you think you’re capable of. We often underestimate our potential, so it can be beneficial to create the habit of doubting what you think you can do. It’s often much more than you think.
3、虚怀忘我
不时聆听自己的心声，感受直觉的认知是相当重要的。然而，要是你一点也不想听那些逆耳忠言怎么办？要是你把自己的那些拙招臭棋当成是英明决策又该如何？此时，把它们撂在旁边凉快凉快要比一意孤行好得多。有时甚至最好怀疑你是否真的就象自己想象的那样高明。一般来说，人们常常会低估自己的潜能，这倒有利于我们养成防止头脑过热的习惯，而出现头脑过热现象的机率远比你想象的要多得多。
Feel before you do. A lot of the time we create to do lists or start projects based on what we want to get done or want to accomplish. The feeling is supposed to come after we’re done. We’re supposed to feel good by accomplishing. While this approach seems very logical, it doesn’t always work too well. It’s much better to start with the feeling you want to create, and then choose the actions you want to take that will create that feeling. This is a hard habit to create, because it doesn’t seem reasonable and requires a lot of trust. You’ll also have to have the courage to stop doing a lot of things that don’t create the feeling you want. That takes a lot of guts. But it’s worth it.
4、酝酿成功
很多时候，我们办理列在表上的事项或启动某些项目都是基于自己想做那些事，或想要完成那些项目的意愿。事情办成了我们或许会感到轻松惬意，项目园满完成之后我们也许会觉得心满意足。然而，每当我们认为这类感觉会顺理成章地不期而至之时，它却往往羞羞答答，若隐若现。因此，你不如从工作开始就找到预期的感觉，然后从打算采取的措施之中选择那些能酝酿（成功）感觉的付诸实施。要养成这种习性确实不容易，因为它似乎不合情理而且需要对它充分信任。此外，你还得有勇气终止众多的、不能产生预期感觉的那些事。养成这种习性要花费你大量的心血，可那值得。
What would happen if this was easy…? As a culture we value people that work hard and beat the odds. We think it’s important to pay our dues and grind it out. But what if work didn’t have to be hard? What if your life didn’t have to be hard? What would happen if things were easy? Regularly asking yourself this question and seeing what comes up can be game changing.
5、张弛有度
我们的文化向民众赋予“努力工作，勇于在逆境中拚搏”等价值观，认为重要的是：不仅要竭尽所能，而且应百尺竿头，更进一步。然而，如果工作勿须满负荷运转该如何呢？如果你的生活也并未陷入困境又该如何呢？稍稍放松一点儿就会出事吗？不时这样问问自己，再走着瞧瞧，你就会有所改变的。
What do I think is impossible…? Sometimes we think that we’re only capable of a certain level of achievement. We doubt our own capabilities or think that a certain change would be too hard or impossible. We’ve set ourselves up to fail before we even begin. Ask yourself this question, then ask yourself why you think it’s hard or impossible. Then take a moment to pretend it wasn’t. What would you do differently?
6、自诩自信
有时，我们会觉得自己“水平有限”，不相信自己的能力，或认为“要想提高实在是太难了，甚至是不可能的”。于是，我们在尚未迈步之前就已经把自己置于败局之中了。扪心自问，你至少还有点能力吧？再接着问问，为什么把改变现状看得那么难，或认为根本不可能呢？然后，花点时间自诩自信一番，装着无所畏惧的样子：“那其实一点也不难，我一定能做到”！如此这般之后，你的举止会有什么不同吗？
What would I do if I had everything I needed already…? A lot of the time we think we need more than we do in order to do what we want. We think we need more time. More money. More resources. More support. But is that really true? You can do a lot with a little. Many businesses are built with little to no start up money. Many great projects are started with a simple idea and a willingness to work hard. What if you didn’t need whatever it is you think you need to start? What if you had everything you needed right now?
7、因陋就简
通常，为了做好某件事，我们要求的东西往往比实际需要的多得多。我们认为需要更多的时间，更多的金钱，更多的资源，更多的支持等等。事实果真是这样的吗？其实，凭着因陋就简，你也能干出一番大事业。许多公司都是在只有很少、甚至没有启动资金的情况下建立起来的；许多伟大工程在创业之初能够依靠的仅仅只是一个简单的构思和为之艰苦奋斗的奉献精神。当你要做某事时，要是没有你认为必需的那些东西，你会怎么做？要是现在就有了你要求的所有东西，你又会怎么做？
