《美食祈祷和恋爱》Chapter 50 (108):冥思

When I tried this morning, after an hour or so of unhappy thinking, to dip back into my meditation, I took a new idea with me: compassion. I asked my heart if it could please infuse my soul with a more generous perspective on my mind's workings. Instead of thinking that I was a failure, could I perhaps accept that I am only a human being—and a normal one, at that? The thoughts came up as usual—OK, so it will be—and then the attendant emotions rose, too. I began feeling frustrated and judgmental about myself, lonely and angry. But then a fierce response boiled up from somewhere in the deepest caverns of my heart, and I told myself, "I will not judge you for these thoughts."

今天早上，经过一个钟头左右的苦闷思考后，我尝试带着一种新的想法回到禅坐中——悲悯。我请求自己的心，能否让灵魂更宽厚地看待自己的脑袋运作。不该认为自己是个失败者，或许我该承认自己只是人类而已——一个正常人类。想法一如往常地出现——好，就这样吧——而后伴随而来的情感亦浮现出来。我开始感到挫折，苛刻地评判自己，孤单而愤怒。然后，一个猛烈的回答从我内心深处翻滚而出，我告诉自己：“我不会为了这些想法去评判你。”

My mind tried to protest, said, "Yeah, but you're such a failure, you're such a loser, you'll never amount to anything..."

我的大脑试图抗议：“是的，你是如此失败，你是输家，你永远都成功不了……”

But suddenly it was like a lion was roaring from within my chest, drowning all this claptrap out. A voice bellowed in me like nothing I had ever heard before. It was so internally, eternally loud that I actually clamped my hand over my mouth because I was afraid that if I opened my mouth and let this sound out, it would shake the foundations of buildings as far away as Detroit.

但突然间，我心中发出一阵狮吼，淹没这些无聊的话语。一种前所未有的声音在我内心怒吼。如此发自内心、如此永恒不歇的响亮怒吼，竟使我抬手蒙住嘴巴，害怕自己张开嘴吼出来，使建筑物连根拔起，远达底特律。

And this is what it roared:

吼声是这样的：

YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW STRONG MY LOVE IS!!!!!!!!!

你无法想象我的爱有多强烈！！！！！

The chattering, negative thoughts in my mind scattered in the wind of this statement like birds and jackrabbits and antelopes—they hightailed it out of there, terrified. Silence followed. An intense, vibrating, awed silence. The lion in the giant savannah of my heart surveyed his newly quiet kingdom with satisfaction. He licked his great chops once, closed his yellow eyes and went back to sleep.

我脑子里那些喋喋不休的消极想法，在这句话当中，顷刻烟消云散，有如飞鸟、野兔、羚羊般没命地逃窜而去。一阵强烈、振动、肃然的寂静。我心中草原的那头狮子，心满意足地审视再次沉静的王国。它舔了舔大肉块，闭上黄色的眼睛，再度沉睡。

And then, in that regal silence, finally—I began to meditate on (and with) God. Eat, Pray, Love

而后，在这样威严的寂静中，终于——我开始对神（并同他）展开冥思。