经典轻松幽默英语笑话

在日常繁忙的生活中，也不要忘了放松自己的心情。下面是本站小编为大家带来经典轻松幽默英语笑话，希望大家喜欢!

　经典轻松幽默英语笑话：会说话的钟

While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den. "What is the big brass gong and hammer for?" one of his friends asked. "That is the talking clock," the man replied. "How's it work?"

一个学生带他朋友们参观他的新公寓，甚是得意。“那个大铜锣和锤子是干什么用的?”他的一个朋友问他。“那玩意儿厉害了，那是一个会说话的钟”，学生回答。“这钟怎么工作的”，他的朋友问。

"Watch," the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with the hammer. Suddenly, someone screamed from the other side of the wall, "Knock it off, you idiot! It's two o'clock in the morning!"

“看着，别眨眼了”，那学生走上前一把操起铜锣和锤子，拼命地敲了一下，声音震耳欲聋。突然，他们听到隔壁墙那边有人狂叫，“别敲了，你这白痴!现在是凌晨两点钟了!”

经典轻松幽默英语笑话：我老婆的照片

A businessman enters a tavern, sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini on the rocks.

一个生意人走进一家酒馆，在吧台坐下，点了一杯加冰的双料martini。

After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket, and then orders the bartender to prepare another double martini.

喝完，那生意人往自己衬衣的口袋里瞥了一眼，然后又让服务员把杯子满上。

After he finishes that, he again peeks inside his shirt pocket and orders the bartender to bring another double martini.

喝完，生意人又往自己衬衣的口袋里瞥了一眼，然后又让服务生帮他把杯子满上。

The bartender says, "Look, buddy, I'll bring ya' martinis all night long - but you gotta tell me why you look inside your shirt pocket before you order a refill."

这时酒馆的服务生说话了，“呃，老兄，我整个晚上给你倒martini都没有问题，但你得告诉我，你为什么在点下一杯酒前都要往自己衬衣的口袋里偷偷看那么一眼”。

The customer replies, "I'm peeking at a photo of my wife. When she starts to look good, I know it's time to go home."

生意人回答，“我看的是我老婆的一张照片。如果照片上的人开始变得好看起来，那就说明我喝得差不多了，该回家了。”

经典轻松幽默英语笑话：毒蛇

A father and son snake are out for a nice afternoon slither.

一个阳光明媚的下午，蛇父亲和蛇儿子出去散步。

The son asks, "Dad，are we poisonous snakes?" The father replies proudly, "Yes son, we are rattler snakes! Why do you ask son?" "Because DAD, I just bit my tongue!!"

儿子问：“爸爸，我们是毒蛇吗?”父亲得意的答道：“当然了，孩子，我们是响尾蛇啊!为什么这么问呢?”“因为，我刚把舌头咬破了!”