外国英文风趣笑话

在日常繁忙的生活，也不要忘记了放松自己。下面本站小编为大家带来外国英文风趣笑话，希望大家喜欢!

　外国英文风趣笑话：伊甸园

Adam was walking around the Garden of Eden feeling very lonely, so God asked Adam, “What is wrong with you?"

亚当在伊甸园里走来走去，感到十分的孤独。上帝问亚当:“你怎么了?”

Adam said, "I don’t have anyone to talk to.”

亚当说:“我连个说话的人都没有。”

God said，"I will give you a companion and it will be a woman.” He said, "This person will cook for you and wash your clothes, she will always agree with every decision you make, she will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them.”

上帝说:“我会给你找个伴儿，她就是一个女人。”上帝接着说:“这个人会为你煮饭，洗衣服，她会时时刻刻同意你的意见，她还会为你生儿育女，而且从不会让你在半夜里起床照顾孩子。她更不会唠叨。她总是第一个承认自己错了。当你们有分歧的时候，她也不会头痛，在你需要的时候，她仍旧会毫无保留地给你她全部的爱和热情。”

"She will not nag,” God continued, "and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you've had a disagreement, she will never have a headache and will freely give you love and passion whenever needed.”

亚当问上帝:“想得到这个女人，我要付出什么代价?”

Adam asked God, "What will a woman like this cost?" God said, "An arm and a Leg!”

上帝说:“一条胳膊和一条腿。”

Adam said, "What can I get for just a rib?"

亚当说:“那一根肋骨能换什么?”

AND THE REST IS HISTORY.

于是就有了后来的人类历史。

　外国英文风趣笑话：看掌纹

Paul was ambling through a crowded street fair when he decided to stop and sit at a Palm Reader's table.

保罗正在一条拥挤的街市上闲逛，他停下来，坐在了一个看掌纹人的桌子前。

Said the mysterious old woman, "For fifteen dollars, I can read your love line and tell your romantic future.”

这个神秘的老妇人说:“巧美元，我可以看出你的爱情线和你浪漫的未来。”

Paul readily agreed and the reader took one look at his open palm and said, "I can see that you have no girlfriend.”

保罗欣然地同意了，看掌纹的人看了一眼保罗的掌心说:“我知道你现在没有女朋友。”

"That's true,” said Paul.

“对，”保罗说。

"Oh my goodness，you are extremely lonely, aren't you?"

“哦，我的天啊，你非常的孤独，对吗?”

"Yes，”Paul shamefully admitted. "That's amazing. Can you tell all of this from my love line?"

“对，”保罗害羞的承认了，“太神奇了，你从我的爱情线中看出了这么多事情。”

"Love line? No, from the calluses and blisters.”

“爱情线?不，我是从你手上的茧子和水泡中看出来的。”

外国英文风趣笑话：用了一根棍子，就进了监狱

David St. John, 37，was the victim last week of what police say was a terrible mistake.

37岁的大卫·斯特·约翰，上周成了警察犯的一个大错误的牺牲品。

The two Hayward police officers used their batons to hit St. John, who they didn' t realize was blind，after mistaking his collapsible cane for an illegal martial arts weapon, said Lt. Mitchell Penn, the police department' s internal affairs officer.

警察署的内务警官米切尔·潘说，两名看守警察用警棍打了约翰先生，因为他们没有注意到约翰是一位盲人，错把他的折叠拐杖当作了一种违法的两节棍。

"It was a very regrettable incident,” Penn said Tuesday. "But from what I've seen so far it's not a case of overzealous officers. They had no idea he was blind-they were extremely upset when they found out.”

“这是一桩让人非常抱歉的案子。”潘在星期二时说:“但从我们所分析的情况来看，这不是由于警员过于认真造成的，而是他们确实不知道他是盲人—当他们知道真实情况后，后悔末及。”

Field training officer Eric Ristram said St. John placed in his pants pocket what appeared to be a nunchaku, a martial arts weapon consisting of two round sticks of wood connect by a chain.

野外训练军官伊瑞克·瑞斯姆说:“约翰裤兜里放着一个东西，看上去像是一根两节棍，它是由两个可旋转的木棍组成的，中间被一条链连着。”

The officers thought the man could see their uniforms so they didn't identify themselves when they told St. John to hand over the contents of his pockets. St. John said later he thought he was about to be mugged.

警官在让约翰交出兜里的东西时，以为约翰可以通过他制服来判断他的身份，所以没有出示证件，而约翰说他还以为自己遭劫了呢。