时尚双语:7个贴士 为婚姻注入活力

After years of marriage, mind numbing 9-5s, and the same boring food, fun, and sex, even the best marriage can become stale. By designing our lives from a place of endless possibilities we can literally blow the socks off our relationships and create a world of fun.

When boringness is so prevalent that you hit the snooze button 4 times before dragging yourself out of bed, you know you aren't living the life you love. You cultivate a new love for love and for the sweetheart in your life, and here's how...
7 Ways To Breathe Life Back Into Your Marriage

1. Public Display of Team Effort. When the two of you are in front of other people, make it a rule to not contradict each other. Even when you know your partner is dead wrong, you can still reserve the option to take them aside and discuss the subject with them or wait until later. In this way you are avoiding causing embarrassment to them or undermining them.

2. Cheerleading Unit. Whenever you talk to people about your spouse make sure you tell them every little thing that you adore and admire about your spouse. When that person talks to your spouse in the future they will be sure to mention all the amazing things you have said and about how much love you have for them.

3. Date Your Wife. Instead of falling back into the same week-to-week rut, go out on a fun, spontaneous, and easy-going date. No picking fights, no arguing, just taking pleasure in what you have and loving each other. Be young and sexy again!

4 te Bucket Lists. A bucket list is a goal setting tool used strictly for fun activities. That's basically what you do, create a future of fun, dining, entertainment, adventure and exploration together on paper. This future will determine who you are being in the present, as well as the anticipation and teamwork that will be produced as you work towards achieving this together.

5. Give It To Them. Find out what your partner likes, such as you bringing them dinner while they watch the game (for him), or pouring a glass of wine and just listening attentively (for her) [you get the point], and just being fully giving. It is within your giving that your own love grows for that person. You can't make them love you more, but you can both make yourselves love each other more.

6. Don't Make Them Wrong. This is probably the hardest one of all. It means a total acceptance of both who they are and the decisions they make. What makes this hard is when your spouse is doing something that is killing themselves, like smoking for example, and you have to completely allow them to decide on their own and let them be.

7. Share The Landmark Forum. When Marina and I did the landmark forum together, it brought our extraordinary relationship to new heights that I didn’t expect. At the point I couldn’t even imagine getting any closer to her, despite the fact that we were getting closer each day. As an example, if our relationship was at a 15 out of 10 already, it hit 30 over the course of a weekend. I would say that we got our money’s worth.

结婚数年后，人会对朝九晚五的生活，令人乏味的食物、消遣和作爱方式而变得麻木，就是再美满的婚姻也会变得陈旧。但通过精心设计蕴藏无穷可能的生活环境，我们能够切实的驱除婚姻关系中的阴霾，创立欢乐的园居。

当困乏泛滥到你要与瞌睡挣扎四次才能强迫自己离开床时，你就知道你并不中意所爱的生活。你需为你所爱的生活、所爱的人孕育新的爱。如下是几点建议：

为婚姻注入活力的7点建议

1、公众前要有团队精神。你俩需约定，当有外人在场时要避免发生冲突。甚至当你知道对方是完全错误时，你要将之先搁置，直至剩下你二人时才重提。这样，你才能避免为对方制造尴尬或破坏其声誉。

2、成为鼓舞人心的整体。无论何时与外人谈论配偶时，你务必要提及每件配偶做得令你赞许和钦佩的小事。这样他人再次谈论你的配偶时他们就会提起每个配偶的优点以及你对之的爱慕。

3、与妻子约会。没必要落入每周必定约会的窠臼，自发随性的约会开心得多。因为少了为如何抉择的争执，你们会去享受那一刻，去爱彼此。

4、建立活动清单。活动清单是为获得乐趣的活动而设定目标的工具。它实际上就是在纸上记录下你们为创造快乐而完成做的事，比如吃饭，观看娱乐活动，旅行和探险。这些活动将决定你现在的状态，并且，在共同体验中，你们将会变得出人意料的和谐。

5、把它给他/她。了解对方的喜好并行事。譬如他正在观看游戏，你可以把饭送到他跟前；她喜欢倾诉，你就可以斟一杯酒然后把自己的耳朵交给她；或是赠送礼物给对方。就在给予中你对对方的爱会悄无声息的增长。虽然你可能无法让对方也更爱你，但至少能让自己更爱对方同时也更爱自己。

6、“纵容”对方。这可能是最棘手的一条。这意味着你要完全接纳对方及对方的决定。之所以棘手是因为你的配偶有可能在做的是摧残健康的事，比如吸烟，但你还是不得不完全尊重他的决定，听之任之。

7、分享观点和思想。思想的交流让我和Marina的关系达到我无法预料的新高度。每次交流都让我无法想象能否还能与她更近，事实证明了我们越来越亲近。打个比方，和妻子的关系融洽让我感觉10元购买力似乎有15元之多，而到了周末就能高达30元--我们倍赚了。