诺贝尔文学经典:《宠儿》第3章Part 9

"I asked you who brought you here?"
"I walked here," she said. "A long, long, long, long way. Nobody bring me. Nobody help me."
"You had new shoes. If you walked so long why don't your shoes show it?"
"Paul D, stop picking on her."
"I want to know," he said, holding the knife handle in his fist like a pole.
"I take the shoes! I take the dress! The shoe strings don't fix!" she shouted and gave him a look somalevolent Denver touched her arm.
"I'll teach you," said Denver, "how to tie your shoes," and got a smile from Beloved as a reward.
Paul D had the feeling a large, silver fish had slipped from his hands the minute he grabbed hold of its tail. That it was streaming back off into dark water now, gone but for the glistening marking itsroute. But if her shining was not for him, who then? He had never known a woman who lit up fornobody in particular, who just did it as a general announcement. Always, in his experience, thelight appeared when there was focus. Like the ThirtyMile Woman, dulled to smoke while hewaited with her in the ditch, and starlight when Sixo got there. He never knew himself to mistakeit. It was there the instant he looked at Sethe's wet legs, otherwise he never would have been boldenough to enclose her in his arms that day and whisper into her back.
This girl Beloved, homeless and without people, beat all, though he couldn't say exactly why,considering the coloredpeople he had run into during the last twenty years. During, before andafter the War he had seen Negroes so stunned, or hungry, or tired or bereft it was a wonder theyrecalled or said anything. Who, like him, had hidden in caves and fought owls for food; who, likehim, stole from pigs; who, like him, slept in trees in the day and walked by night; who, like him,had buried themselves in slop and jumped in wells to avoid regulators, raiders, paterollers,veterans, hill men, posses and merrymakers. Once he met a Negro about fourteen years old wholived by himself in the woods and said he couldn't remember living anywhere else. He saw awitless coloredwoman jailed and hanged for stealing ducks she believed were her own babies.

“我问你是谁带你来这儿的？”
“我走来的，”她说，“好长、好长、好长、好长的一条路。没人带我。没人帮我。”
“你穿着新鞋。你要是走了这么长的路，怎么从鞋子上看不出来？”
“保罗·D，别再挑她毛病了。”
“我想知道。”他说道，把刀把儿像根旗杆似的攥在手中。
“我拿了鞋子!我拿了裙子!这鞋带系不上!”她叫嚷着，那样恶毒地瞪了他一眼，丹芙不禁轻轻去摸她的胳膊。
“我来教你，”丹芙说，“怎么系鞋带。”她得到了宠儿投来的一笑，作为奖赏。
保罗·D觉得，他刚抓住一条银亮亮的大鱼的尾巴，就让它从手边滑脱了。此刻它又游进黑暗的水中，隐没了，然而闪闪的鱼鳞标出了它的航线。可是她的光芒如果不是为他，又是为谁而发的呢？他见过的女人，没有一个不是为了某个特定的人容光焕发，而只是泛泛地展示一番。凭他的经验而论，总是先有了焦点，周围才现出光芒。就说“三十英里女子”吧，同他一起等在沟里的时候，简直迟钝得冒烟儿，可西克索一到，她就成了星光。他还从未发现自己搞错过。他头一眼看见塞丝的湿腿时就是这种情形，否则他那天绝不会鲁莽得去把她拥在怀中，对着她的脊背柔声软语。
这个无家无亲的姑娘宠儿，可真是出类拔萃，尽管把二十年来遇见过的黑人琢磨个遍，他都不能准确地说出为什么。战前、战后以及战争期间，他见过许多黑奴，晕眩、饥饿、疲倦或者被掠夺到了如此地步，让他们重新唤起记忆或说出任何事情都是个奇迹。像他一样，他们躺在山洞里，与猫头鹰争食；像他一样，他们偷猪食吃；像他一样，他们白天睡在树上，夜里赶路；像他一样，他们把身子埋进泥浆，跳到井里，躲开管理员、袭击者、刽子手、退役兵、山民、武装队和寻欢作乐的人们。有一次，他遇到一个大约十四岁的黑孩子独自在林子里生活，他说他不记得在别处住过。他见过一个糊里糊涂的黑女人被抓起来、绞死，因为她偷了几只鸭子，误以为那是她自己的婴儿。