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英语笑话爆笑超级搞笑的

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下面是本站小编整理的一些关于there be在英语中的特殊用法, 希望大家喜欢。

英语笑话爆笑超级搞笑的

  英语爆笑笑话一:三人同舟

Three men were sitting on a park bench. The one in the middle was reading a newspaper; the others were pretending to fish. They baited imaginary hooks, cast lines and reeled in their catch.

A passing policeman stopped to watch the spectacle and asked the man in the middle if he knew the other two.

"Oh yes, " he said. "They are my friends.

"In that case, " warned the officer, "you'd better get them out of here!"

"Yes, sir, " the man replied, and he began rowing furiously.

三位男子在公园的长椅上坐着。中间的一个在读报纸,另外两个在假装钓鱼。他们给想象的鱼钩上鱼饵,放线,并卷线把鱼抓上来。

一位过路警察驻足观察了这个景象,他问中间的那个男子是否认识其他两位。

“喔,认识,”他说,“他们是我的朋友。”

“那样的话,”警察告诫说,“你最好把他们从这里弄走。”

“好的,警官。”那男子回答说,接着就开始疯狂般地做起划桨的动作来。

  英语爆笑笑话二:As If Awakening From A Dream

A competition which subject is on giving up drinking is proceeding. One of lecturers says excitedly, " Alcohol can break down conjugal(婚姻的) relation, even cause your wife to leave you… "

A man shouts out at the news, "Give me another bottle of Brandy."

以戒酒为主题的演讲比赛正在进行,一个演讲者动情地说:“酒精可以破坏夫妻关系,甚至导致妻子离开自己的丈夫……”

这时一个男人大声喊:“再来一瓶白兰地!”

  英语爆笑笑话三:离婚

A husband and wife,both 91,stood before a judge,asking for a divorce."I don't understand,"He said,"Why do you want a divorce at this time of life?"

the husband explained "Well , you see,We wanted to wait until the children died."

有一个丈夫和妻子都是91岁,他们站在法官面前,要求离婚。“我不明白,”法官说,“你们为什么到了这把年纪还要离婚?”

丈夫解释道:“嗯,你是知道的,我们以前是哟等到孩子们都死了。”

  英语爆笑笑话四:I do not recognize you

Walking on the beach one day he saw a crab1, went to see what happens, suddenly crab pincers(钳子) folder2, then crab bush run. Tiger jumped the pain, followed by the recovery of crabs3!

Catch up with no trees on the crab, and then to see a tiger in Shou Network spiders, tiger angry at Spider: Good you a crab! Do you think you posted on the Web and I do not recognize you!

一天老虎在沙滩散步,见到一只螃蟹,就走过去想看个究竟,突然被螃蟹的钳子夹了一下,螃蟹拔腿就往树丛里跑。老虎痛得跳起来了,紧接着就追螃蟹!

追到树丛就不见螃蟹了,这时老虎看见一只守在大网中的蜘蛛,老虎对着蜘蛛发火了:好你个螃蟹!你以为你上了网我就不认得你了!

  英语爆笑笑话五:A Smart Parrot 聪明的鹦鹉

A curious guy goes to a pet shop to buy a parrot. There he sees a parrot with a red string tied to its left leg and a green string tied to it's right leg. He asks the owner the significance of the strings1. "Well, this is a highly trained parrot. If you pull the red string he speaks French; if you pull the green string he speaks German," replies the shop keeper.

"And what happens if I pull both the strings?" our curious shopper inquires.

"I fall off my perch2 you fool!!" screeches3 the parrot.

有个人去宠物店买鹦鹉。在那里,他看见有只鹦鹉的左腿被红线系住,右腿则被绿线系住。对此他感到不解,于是他问该店的老板,老板回答说:“这只鹦鹉受过特殊的训练。如果拉红线,它就讲法语,拉绿线,它则讲德语。”

这个好奇的人接着问,“要是我两条线都拉,会怎么样呢?”

“我就会掉下来了,你这个傻瓜!!”鹦鹉尖叫着说。