最新英语幽默小故事
英语幽默故事简短，内容诙谐幽默，情节生动有趣。今天小编整理了一些英语小故事，希望对大家喜欢。
最新英语幽默小故事:吃树根和树叶
A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!"
一只熊猫走进一家参观，要了一个三明治。吃完以后，熊猫掏出一把手枪，打中了服务员，站起来准备走。“嘿!”经理叫道，“你还想去哪?你打中了我的服务员而且你没付钱!”
The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!"
熊猫也叫道：“诶你怎么回事啊，我是熊猫!看清楚啊!”
The manager opens his dictionary and sees the following definition for panda: "A tree-dwelling marsupial of Asian origin, characterised by distinct black and white colouring. Eats shoots and leaves."
经理打开字典，查到了熊猫的定义：“一种住在树上的有袋类亚洲动物，以分明的黑色和白色皮毛为特征。吃树根和树叶。”
英语幽默小故事精选：兔子与蛇
A blind rabbit and a blind snake meet each other. Neither one remembers what kind of animal they are, so they decide to feel each other.
一只瞎眼的兔子和一只瞎眼的蛇相遇了。它们俩都知道自己是什么动物，但不知道对方是什么，于是它们都决定试试对方
The rabbit says, "You feel me first." The snake says okay, and he starts feeling the rabbit.
兔子说：“你先摸摸我。”蛇同意了，它摸了一下兔子。
He says, "Well, you have fur all over, and a little cotton tail, and two long ears, and big back feet..."
蛇说：“额，你全身都有皮毛，有一个小棉球似的尾巴，耳朵很长，后腿很粗壮…”
The rabbit says, "I know! I'm a rabbit! Yippee!" Then the rabbit feels the snake.
兔子说，“我知道!我是只兔子!耶!”然后兔子摸了一下蛇。
He says, "Okay, you're long and thin, and slimy all over, and there's a little forked tongue..."
兔子说，“好吧，你长长的细细的，全身都滑溜溜的，还有一根分叉的舌头…”
The snake says, "Oh no! I'm a lawyer."
蛇说：“不!我是个律师”
英语幽默小故事：企鹅和动物园
A man is driving down the freeway with his two pet penguins when he gets pulled over by a cop for speeding. After the cop hands over the speeding ticket to the driver, he notices the 2 penguins. The cop informs the driver that he must take the penguins to the zoo. The driver agrees to do so.
一个人带着两只宠物企鹅在高速公路上开车，然后因为超速被一个警察抄了牌子。警察将超速罚单交给他时，他注意到了这两只企鹅，并告诉这个人，必须把企鹅带去动物园。这个人同意了。
Two months later, the same man is pulled over by the same cop for speeding. The cop notices the penguins again only now they are wearing sun glasses and eating ice cream.
两个月后，这个人又被同一个警察因为超速逮到了。警察再一次注意到了企鹅，它们还戴着太阳眼镜，吃着冰激凌。
The cop says, "I thought I told you to take those penguins to the zoo."
警察说：“我是不是已经告诉你要把这些企鹅带去动物园了。”
The man responds, "I did take them to the zoo, now I'm taking them to the beach."
这个人回答道，“我确实带了它们去动物园呀，现在我带它们去沙滩。”
