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英语开心一刻幽默小笑话 英语诗歌

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笑话和幽默的感染力,很大程度上依赖于修辞格的运用。把修辞格有意识地运用到笑话幽默的创作中去,能够为人们提供更好的精神产品。下面是本站小编带来的英语开心一刻幽默小笑话,欢迎阅读!

英语开心一刻幽默小笑话 英语诗歌

  英语开心一刻幽默小笑话篇一

Looking very unhappy, a poor man entered a doctor's consulting-room.

"Doctor," he said, "you must help me. I swallowed a penny about a month ago."

"Good heavens, man!" said the doctor. "Why have you waited so long? Why don't you come to me on the day you swallowed it?"

"To tell you the truth, Doctor," the poor man replied, "I didn't need the money so badly then."

一个看起来很难受的穷人走进大夫的诊室。

"大夫!"他说,"帮帮我!一个月前我吞了一分硬币!"

"天哪,"大夫说,"早干嘛去了?你当时怎么不来看?"

"实话告诉您吧,大夫,"穷人说,"我当时还不缺钱!"

  英语开心一刻幽默小笑话篇二

刚来加拿大的时候去买快餐,英文很烂我就说i want combo one,(大号的)后来那个人又说了一大堆英文问我要洋葱cheese(奶酪)么之类的?我听不懂就一个劲说i want combo one,

后来我看见那个人像中国人,我就直接问他Can you spell Chinese? (你能拼写中文吗?)

然后那个人郁闷了好久我为啥问他能能拼chinese..

后来才发现是speak不是spell............

  英语开心一刻幽默小笑话篇三

Do You Know Santa's True Profession?

Consider the following:

1. You never actually see Santa, only his "assistants."

2. Santa keeps his job until he decides to retire.

3. Santa doesn't really do the work; he directs a bunch of helpers to do all his work for him, but he's the one who everybody credits with the work.

4. Santa doesn't work a 40-hour week.

5. Santa travels a lot.

Santa is obviously a senior faculty member with tenure!

圣诞老人的真实职业是什么?

考虑以下几点

1. 你其实从来没见过圣诞老人,你看见的都是他得助手(他得助手真的好多,除了过圣诞节的所有父母外,还有职业“圣诞老人”)

2. 圣诞老人不想退休,就可以一直当他的圣诞老人。

3. 圣诞老人不会做实事,他都是指挥一堆帮手帮他做完所有的事情,但是事情做得好还是不好,功绩和责任都算圣诞老人的。

4. 圣诞老人实行的可不是朝九晚五双休制。

5. 圣诞老人经常旅行

圣诞老人显然是一个高级职员(please, 这世界上还有比他的工作更好的工作吗?)

  英语开心一刻幽默小笑话篇四

A tourist was visiting New Mexico and was amazed at the dinosaur bones lying about.

"How old are these bones?" the tourist asked an elderly Native American, who served as a guide.

"Exactly one hundred million and three years old.

"How can you be so sure?" inquired the tourist.

"Well," replied the guide, " a geologist came by here and told me these bones were one hundred million years old, and that was exactly three years ago.

一位游客在新墨西哥游览。他对随处可见的恐龙化石甚感惊奇。

“这些化石有多长的历史?”游客问一个上了年纪的当地美国人。他是作向导的。

“整整十亿零三年了。” “你怎么这么肯定?”游客问道。 “哦,”向导回答道,“一个地质学家来过这儿,他告诉我说这些化石有十亿年了,再加上那是整整三年前的事了。”

  英语开心一刻幽默小笑话篇五

An artist was part of an exhibition, and he asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings that were currently on display.

"I've got good news and bad news," the owner replied.

"Give me the good news first," the artist demanded.

"The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told him it would, he bought all 15 of your paintings."

"That's wonderful!" the artist exclaimed, "What could the bad news possibly be?"

With concern, the gallery owner replied, "The gentleman in question was your doctor."

以为艺术家在一个画廊办了个展览,他问店主是否有人对他参展的画感兴趣。

“我有一个好消息和一个坏消息。”店主回答。

“先告诉我好消息。”画家要求道。

“好消息是一位绅士询问了你的作品,还问它是否会在你死后增。我告诉他会的,然后他买下了你所有的15幅画作。”

“那太棒了!”画家惊叹。“那么什么会是坏消息呢?”

店主想了想之后说:“问那个问题的是你的医生”。


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