经典科幻文学:《银河系漫游指南》第21章1

On the surface of Magrathea Arthur wandered about moodily.
Ford had thoughtfully left him his copy of The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy to while away the time with. He pushed a few buttons at random.
The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a very unevenly edited book and contains many passages that simply seemed to its editors like a good idea at the time.
One of these (the one Arthur now came across) supposedly relates the experiences of one Veet Voojagig, a quiet young student at the University of Maximegalon, who pursued a brilliant academic career studying ancient philology, transformational ethics and the wave harmonic theory of historical perception, and then, after a night of drinking Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters with Zaphod Beeblebrox, became increasingly obsessed with the problem of what had happened to all the biros he'd bought over the past few years.
There followed a long period of painstaking research during which he visited all the major centres of biro loss throughout the galaxy and eventually came up with a quaint little theory which quite caught the public imagination at the time. Somewhere in the cosmos, he said, along with all the planets inhabited by humanoids, reptiloids, fishoids, walking treeoids and superintelligent shades of the colour blue, there was also a planet entirely given over to biro life forms. And it was to this planet that unattended biros would make their way, slipping away quietly through wormholes in space to a world where they knew they could enjoy a uniquely biroid lifestyle, responding to highly biro-oriented stimuli, and generally leading the biro equivalent of the good life.
And as theories go this was all very fine and pleasant until Veet Voojagig suddenly claimed to have found this planet, and to have worked there for a while driving a limousine for a family of cheap green retractables, whereupon he was taken away, locked up, wrote a book, and was finally sent into tax exile, which is the usual fate reserved for those who are determined to make a fool of themselves in public.
When one day an expedition was sent to the spatial coordinates that Voojagig had claimed for this planet they discovered only a small asteroid inhabited by a solitary old man who claimed repeatedly that nothing was true, though he was later discovered to be lying.
There did, however, remain the question of both the mysterious 60,000 Altairan dollars paid yearly into his Brantisvogan bank account, and of course Zaphod Beeblebrox's highly profitable second-hand biro business.
Arthur read this, and put the book down.
The robot still sat there, completely inert.
Arthur got up and walked to the top of the crater. He walked around the crater. He watched two suns set magnificently over Magrathea.
He went back down into the crater. He woke the robot up because even a manically depressed robot is better to talk to than nobody.
"Night's falling," he said. "Look robot, the stars are coming out."
From the heart of a dark nebula it is possible to see very few stars, and only very faintly, but they were there to be seen.
The robot obediently looked at them, then looked back.
"I know," he said. "Wretched isn't it?"

在曼格拉斯的表面上，阿瑟郁闷地走来走去。
细心的福特特意把自己的《银河系漫游指南》留给他打发时间。他随便按下几个键。
《银河系漫游指南》是一本编辑得相当不均衡的书，里面包含了大量的章节，其内容仅仅在当时的编辑看来似乎还不错，值得选入。
其中之一（就是阿瑟现在刚刚翻到的）是想像的关于维特。沃佳吉格的经历。他是一个马克希姆佳伦大学的年轻学生，从事着一项聪明人的学术事业，研究古代语言学、转换生成规则，以及历史感知和谐波理论。然而，一天晚上，他和赞福德·毕博布鲁克斯喝了几杯泛银河系含漱爆破药，于是他开始越来越为一个问题所困扰，这个问题就是过去这些年来他买的所有圆珠笔最后都怎么样了。
接下来就是一段长时间的艰苦研究。在这段时间内他拜访了整个银河系中所有主要的圆珠笔遗失中心，最后终于得出一个很有些离奇的理论，当时还引起了公众极大的兴趣。他认为，在宇宙中的某个地方，和所有居住着人形生物、爬行类生物、鱼形生物、直立树形生物以及具有超级智慧的蓝色阴影的行星一样，还存在着一颗全部由圆珠笔形生命形式占据的行星。所有无人看管的圆珠笔都会通过空间中的虫洞无声无息地滑向这颗星球，他们知道在这个世界里自己能享受到一种独一无二的圆珠笔形生命状态，享受到一种完全平等的美好生活。
这些说法作为一种理论还是相当令人愉快的，但最后维特。沃佳吉格突然宣布自己已经找到了这颗行星，并且已经在那里工作了一段时间，为一个廉价的绿色可回收圆珠笔家庭当司机，驾驶一辆豪华轿车。于是，他被带走关押起来，写了一本书，最后遭到放逐——这是那些决心当众出乖露丑的人通常的下场。
有一天，一支探险队被派往沃佳吉格宣称的那颗行星所在的位置，他们只发现了一颗小行星，上面孤零零地住着一个老人，不断反复宣称一切都不是真的。当然，后来才发现他在撒谎。
这个事件最后仍旧存有疑问。第一点是：神秘地每年存入他在勃兰蒂斯沃根银行账户的那6万牵牛星元，第二点当然就是赞福德·毕博布鲁克斯所从事的利润高昂的二手圆珠笔生意。
阿瑟看完这些，随手把书放下了。
机器人仍旧坐在那儿，一副迟钝的样子。
阿瑟站起身来，爬到环形山顶端。他沿着环形山走着，看见两颗太阳正壮观地沉入曼格拉斯的地干线。
他回到坑底，唤醒了机器人。毕竟，与一个狂躁的机器人说说话总比没人交谈强。
“天快黑了。”他说，“你瞧，机器人，星星已经出来了。”
处在暗黑星云的中心，能看见的星星很少，而且很微弱，不过它们确实在那儿，可以看见。
机器人顺从地看了星星一眼，然后重又垂下头。
“我知道，”他说，“悲惨啊，对吗？”