经典科幻文学:《宇宙尽头的餐馆》第21章1

Chapter 21
Down on the dry, red world of Kakrafoon, in the middle of the vast Rudlit Desert, the stage technicians were testing the sound system.
That is to say, the sound system was in the desert, not the stage technicians. They had retreated to the safety of Disaster Area’s giant control ship which hung in orbit some four hundred miles above the surface of the planet, and they were testing the sound system from there. Anyone within five miles of the speaker silos wouldn’t have survived the tuning up.
If Arthur Dent had been within five miles of the speaker silos then his expiring thought would have been that in both size and shape the sound rig closely resembled Manhattan. Risen out of the silos, the neutron phase speaker stacks towered monstrously against the sky, obscuring the banks of plutonium reactors and seismic amps behind them.
Buried deep in concrete bunkers beneath the city of speakers lay the instruments that the musicians would control from their ship, the massive photon-ajuitar, the bass detonator and the Megabang drum complex.
It was going to be a noisy show.
Aboard the giant control ship, all was activity and bustle. Hotblack Desiato’s limoship, a mere tadpole beside it, had arrived and docked, and the lamented gentleman was being transported down the high vaulted corridors to meet the medium who was going to interpret his psychic impulses on to the ajuitar keyboard.
A doctor, a logician and a marine biologist had also just arrived, flown in at phenomenal expense from Maximegalon to try to reason with the lead singer who had locked himself in the bathroom with a bottle of pills and was refusing to come out till it could be proved conclusively to him that he wasn’t a fish. The bass player was busy machine-gunning his bedroom and the drummer was nowhere on board.
Frantic inquiries led to the discovery that he was standing on a beach on Santraginus V over a hundred light years away where, he claimed, he had been happy over half an hour now and had found a small stone that would be his friend.
The band’s manager was profoundly relieved. It meant that for the seventeenth time on this tour the drums would be played by a robot and that therefore the timing of the cymbalistics would be right.
The sub-ether was buzzing with the communications of the stage technicians testing the speaker channels, and this it was that was being relayed to the interior of the black ship.
Its dazed occupants lay against the back wall of the cabin, and listened to the voices on the monitor speakers.
“OK, channel nine on power,” said a voice, “testing channel fifteen…”
Another thumping crack of noise walloped through the ship.
“Channel fifteen AOK,” said another voice.
A third voice cut in.
“The black stunt ship is now in position,” it said, “it’s looking good. Gonna be a great sundive. Stage computer on line?”
A computer voice answered.
“On line,” it said.
“Take control of the black ship.”
“Black ship locked into trajectory programme, on standby.”
“Testing channel twenty.”

第二十一章
在卡库拉冯干燥的红色世界里，路德利特大沙漠的中部，舞台技术人员正在测试音响系统。
这是说，只有音响系统在沙漠里，而不是那些技术人员。他们已经撤退到了安全地区——“灾难地带”乐队的巨型控制飞船停留在这颗行星表面上空差不多四百英里高的轨道上。他们从那里测试音效。距离扬声器发射井五英里之内的任何人，都不可能幸存下来完成调音工作。
如果阿瑟·邓特处在距离扬声器发射井五英里之内的区域内，临死之前，他将意识到，这些音响设备无论在规模还是形状上，都与曼啥顿极其相似。中于相位扬声器组群从这些发射井里伸出来，像可怕的巨兽，矗立在天空下，遮住了成排的钚反应堆，以及它们后面的地震级电吉他。
深埋在这座扬声器城市下面的混凝土碉堡里的是乐手们能够从龟船上加以控制的乐器，光子吉他、重低音雷管，还有超巨响组合鼓。
这将是一场响亮喧嚣的演出。
巨型控制飞船上，一切都显得活跃而匆忙。霍特布莱克，迪西亚托的豪华飞船停靠在对接坞上，跟这艘巨型飞船相比，活像一只蝌蚪。这位已逝的先生被人从高高的拱形廊道上转移下来，以便和媒介器连接，媒介器将把他的精神冲动传递到电吉他的键盘上，
一位医生、一位逻辑学家和一位海洋生物学家也刚剐抵达，他们花费了显然非常昂贵的成本从马克希姆佳伦飞过来，希望能和乐队的主唱进行沟通。后者把自己锁在卫生间里，拿着一瓶药片，宣称他拒绝出来，除非有人能向他确切地证明他不是一条鱼。乐队的鲰斯手正在用机枪扫射他的卧室，而鼓手则根本不在船上。
经过一番疯狂的调查，终于发现他正站在一百光年以外的桑特拉金斯5号星的一片沙滩上，在那里，他宣称自己已经快乐地度过了超过半小时的时光，并且已经找到了一块将成为他的朋友的小石头。
乐队的经理由衷地松了一口气，因为这意味着，在这次巡回演出期间，这些鼓将第十七次由一个机器人来演奏，凶此，鼓点节拍将掌握得恰到好处。
亚以太嗡嗡作响，传递着测试扬声器各频道的舞台技术人员彼此之间交流的信息。传人那艘黑色飞船内部的正是这种信息。
在它里面，那几个被震得头晕眼花的乘客靠在黑色舱壁上，听到了监听扬声器里传来的声音。
“好的，九频道启动，”一个声音说，“现在测试十五频道”
又一声雷鸣般的巨响碾过飞船。
“十五频道A，OK。”另一个声音说。
第一个声音捕了进来；
“黑色特技飞船已经就位，”这声音说，“看上去状态不错。这次太阳俯冲肯定壮观极了。舞台电脑在线上吗‘”
一个电脑的声音回答了他。
“在线上。”它说。
“接管黑色飞船。”
“黑色飞船已经锁定轨迹程序，随时待命。”
“换二十频道。”