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趣味经典英语笑话

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在日常繁忙的生活中,也不要忘了放松自己的心情。下面是本站小编为大家带来趣味经典英语笑话,希望大家喜欢!

趣味经典英语笑话

趣味经典英语笑话:为什么

A cemetery grounds keeper was going about his rounds when he saw a man lying on a grave,

“位墓园管理员在巡视的时候,看见一名男子躺在坟墓上,

sobbing loudly and pounding his fits on the ground,

大声哭泣,并且用他的拳头重重地敲打地面.他悲痛地说:

"Why did you have to die?Oh,why?Why?Why?"he lamented.

"你为什么一定要死?哦,为什么?为什么?为什么?”

"A loved one's passing is a terrible lose."the grounds keeper offered in consolation,

墓园管理员安慰他说“心爱的人死去是个很难受的损失,

"but someday,the pain will pass."

但是终有一天,伤痛会过去的。”

"Love one?" the weeping man said ,looking up.

这位哭泣的男子抬起头看着他说:“心爱的人?

" I didn't even know the guy."

我根本不认识这个人。…

"Then why all the tears? "

"那为什么要痛哭流涕呢?…"

"He was my wife's first husband!"

"他是我老婆的笫一任老公呀!”

 趣味经典英语笑话:工作中的面试

Reaching the end of a job interview ,

到了工作面试的最后部分,

the personnel recruitment officer asken a young engineer fresh out of Cambridge,

人事招聘主管问一位刚从剑桥 桥毕业的年轻工程师:

" And what starting salary were you looking for?"

“你想要起薪多少呢 ?”

The engineer said,"In the neighborhood of $140,000 a year,depending on the benefits package ."

工程师说 :“太约一年十四万左右吧,要视整体福利而定。”

The interviewer said,"Well ,what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation,

面试主管说:“嗯,五个礼拜的假期,

14 paid holidays,full medical and dental,

十四天带薪假,全额补助医疗和看牙科,

company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary ,

百分之五十薪资的公司相对退休基金,

and a company car leased every 2 years ,say,a red sports Mercedes? "

每两年公司租用配车,比如说,红色的奔驰跑车,你觉得怎幺样呀?”

The engineer sat up straight and said ,

工程师挺直坐着说:

"Wow!Are you kidding?"

“哇!你在开玩笑吧?”

And the interviewer replied,"Yeah,but you started it."

面试主管回答说 :“对呀。不过是你起头的呀。”

 趣味经典英语笑话:决不放弃

A government employee found and old brass lamp in a filing cabinet.

有一位政府机关员工在档案柜里面发现一盏老旧的铜制油灯。

When he dusted it off,a genie appeared and granted him three wishes.

当他把它的灰尘除去的时候。有一个精灵出现了 ,并且同意他三个愿望。

"I'd love an ice-cold beer right now,"

他告诉精灵 “我现在马上就要一瓶冰啤酒 。”

he told the genie ! A beer appeared .

砰!一瓶啤酒出现了。

Next the man said," I wish to be on an island,surrounded by becautiful and willing woman."

这个人接着说:“我想要到一个岛上, 被甘心乐意的美女围绕着。”

Poof!He was on an island with gorgeous woman fawning all over him.

砰!他到了一个岛上,被美女纠缠着对他献殷勤。

Oh,this is the life,the guy thought.

这家伙想着啊,这才是生活呀。

"I wish I never had to work again."

“我希望我永远都不必再工作。”

And poof! He was back at his desk in the government office!

砰!他回到他在政府机关的 办公桌前。