英语趣味笑话
英语趣味笑话：汽车配件 Automobile Fittings
A lorry driver makes inquiry of a mountaineer, "Excuse me, where can I buy the auto accessories(附件) in the neighborhood?"
Mountaineer says, "Some people usually drive heroic car on the road. There is a abrupt turn(急转弯) ahead not far from here, and a clough(深谷) just below it, where you can find all kinds of the auto accessories. You will spend no money at all."
一个卡车司机向一山民打听：“请问，这附近哪儿能买到汽车配件?”
山民说：“这条路上经常有人开英雄车，前面不远处是个急转弯，急转弯的下面就是深谷，那深谷里什么样的汽车配件都有——根本用不着花钱。”
英语趣味笑话：拍卖会上 At Auction Fair
At auction spot, someone has lost a bag, in which has the vital document.
The owner says, "Once who picked it up brings it to me, I will take out 200 dollars to remunerate reward him or her."
On hearing the news, another chap(小伙子，家伙) shouts out:" I reward 300 dollars."
拍卖会上，有人的包丢了，里面装有重要文件。物主说：“有谁拣到送还，我将拿出200美元以表酬谢。”
话刚出口，就听有人喊：“我出300美元。”
英语趣味笑话：The Doctor Knows Better
A man was hit by a cab in the street. He was brought to the hospital. His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "I think that he is very ill."
"I am afraid that he is dead." said the doctor.
Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "I'm not dead. I'm still alive."
"Be quiet, " said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!"
一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院。他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说：“我想他伤得很厉害。”
医生说：“恐怕他已经死了。”
听到医生的话，这个男人转动着头说：“我没死，我还活着。”
妻子说：“安静，医生比你懂得多。”
英语趣味笑话：Now I have two skunks in there
"We have a skunk in the basement," shrieked the caller to the police dispatcher. "How can we get it out?"
"Take some bread crumbs," said the dispatcher, "and put down a trail from the basement out to the back yard. Then leave the cellar door open."
Sometime later the resident called back. "Did you get rid of it?" asked the dispatcher.
"No," replied the caller. "Now I have two skunks in there!"
“我们的地下室里有一只臭鼬，”打电话的人对警察调度员尖叫道。“我们怎样才能把它弄出来?”
“弄一些面包屑，”调度员说;“从地下室往外铺一条小道直到后院。然后将地下室的门打开。”
一段时间后，那人又打电话打了回来。“你们将它弄出来了吗?”调度员问他。
“没有，”打电话的人答道，“现在那儿有两只臭鼬了。
英语趣味笑话：One Side of the Case 一面之辞
A judge asked our group of potential jurors whether anyone should be excused, and one man raised his hand.
"I can't hear out of my left ear," the man told the judge.
"Can you hear out of your right ear?" the judge asked. The man nodded his head.
"You'll be allowed to serve on the jury," the judge declared. "We only listen to one side of the case at a time."
一位法官问我们这群修补陪审员是否有人应当免权。一个人举起了手。
“我的左耳听不见。”那人告诉法官。
“你的右边耳朵听得见吗?”法官问道。那人点了点头。
“你将被允许加入陪审团，”法官宣布。“我们每次只听一面之辞。”
英语趣味笑话：One Side of the Case 一面之辞
A judge asked our group of potential jurors whether anyone should be excused, and one man raised his hand.
"I can't hear out of my left ear," the man told the judge.
"Can you hear out of your right ear?" the judge asked. The man nodded his head.
"You'll be allowed to serve on the jury," the judge declared. "We only listen to one side of the case at a time."
一位法官问我们这群修补陪审员是否有人应当免权。一个人举起了手。
“我的左耳听不见。”那人告诉法官。
“你的右边耳朵听得见吗?”法官问道。那人点了点头。
“你将被允许加入陪审团，”法官宣布。“我们每次只听一面之辞。”
