经典科幻文学:《生命 宇宙及一切》第18章4

Tell me it was a coincidence, Dent, it said. I dare you to tell me it was a coincidence!
It was a coincidence, said Arthur quickly.
It was not! came the answering bellow.
It was, said Arthur, it was…
If it was a coincidence, then my name, roared the voice, is not Agrajag!!!
And presumably, said Arthur, you would claim that that was your name.
Yes! hissed Agrajag, as if he had just completed a rather deft syllogism.
Well, I’m afraid it was still a coincidence, said Arthur.
Come in here and say that! howled the voice, in sudden apoplexy again.
Arthur walked in and said that it was a coincidence, or at least, he nearly said that it was a coincidence. His tongue rather lost its footing towards the end of the last word because the lights came up and revealed what it was he had walked into.
It was a Cathedral of Hate.
It was the product of a mind that was not merely twisted, but actually sprained.
It was huge. It was horrific.
It had a Statue in it.
We will come to the Statue in a moment.
The vast, incomprehensibly vast chamber looked as if it had been carved out of the inside of a mountain, and the reason for this was that that was precisely what it had been carved out of. It seemed to Arthur to spin sickeningly round his head as he stood and gaped at it.
It was black. Where it wasn’t black you were inclined to wish that it was, because the colours with which some of the unspeakable details were picked out ranged horribly across the whole spectrum of eye-defying colours from Ultra Violent to Infra Dead, taking in Liver Purple, Loathsome Lilac, Matter Yellow, Burnt hombre and Gan Green on the way.
The unspeakable details which these colours picked out were gargoyles which would have put Francis Bacon off his lunch. The gargoyles all looked inwards from the walls, from the pillars, from the flying buttresses, from the choir stalls, towards the Statue, to which we will come in a moment.
And if the gargoyles would have put Francis Bacon off his lunch, then it was clear from the gargoyles’ faces that the Statue would have put them off theirs, had they been alive to eat it, which they weren’t, and had anybody tried to serve them some, which they wouldn’t.
Around the monumental walls were vast engraved stone tablets in memory of those who had fallen to Arthur Dent.

“告诉我那是巧合，邓特。”它说，“你敢不敢告诉我那是个巧合？！”
“那是个巧合。”阿瑟赶紧说。
“那不是！”对方怒吼道。
“是的……”阿瑟说，“那是的……”
“如果那是个巧合，那我的名字，“对方咆哮着，”就不叫阿格拉贾格！“
“那么似乎……”阿瑟说，“你的意思是它仍然是你的名字。”
“当然！”阿格拉贾格嘶吼道，仿佛认为自己刚刚完成了一次巧妙的推理。
“嗯，恐怕那还是个巧合。”阿瑟说，
“给我过来！”对方嚎叫起来，就像突然中风了似的。
阿瑟步入其中，一边说着“那是个巧合”——其实是几乎要说出“那是个巧合”，因为他的舌头还没卷出最后一个单词，周围的灯光就亮起来了。
那是一座仇恨大教堂。
它是意识的产物——不只是扭曲的意识，而且是扭坏了的意识。
它空旷。它恐怖。
它正中间有一尊雕像。
我们很快会谈到它。
这个内室很宽大，宽得不可思议，像是在大山里面挖出来的。其实它就是这么挖出来的。阿瑟觉得整个大厅都在不停旋转，他只好张大了嘴巴，呆立在那儿。
这里很暗。有一些不暗的地方，你会更希望它们是暗的。因为，它们是特意突出色彩的细节，那些细节很不便形容。它们几乎囊括了光谱上所有不顺眼的颜色，从淤血紫外色一直到鲜血红外色，包括了死尸紫、气愤粉、慌张黄、骨折赭和焦虑绿等等。这些不便形容的、特意突出色彩的细节，是一些小塑像，它们能让弗兰西斯·培根①都吃不下午餐。
那些小塑像都面朝中央，背靠墙壁、柱子、拱扶垛、圣坛等。它们都对着中间那尊雕像，那尊我们很快会谈到的雕像。
如果说，那些小塑像能让弗兰西斯·培根都吃不下午餐的话，那么，小塑像们的表情就像在说，中间那尊雕像让他们都吃不下午餐了。如果他们能活着的话。当然，他们没能活着，也没有人给他们午餐吃，所以他们是吃不成的。
四周的纪念墙上，放有许多石碑，刻着为阿瑟所害的亡者的名字。