经典科幻文学:《生命 宇宙及一切》第16章1

The Campaign for Real Time, which I will tell you about later. I noticed that five pieces of jetsam which had in relatively recent times plopped back into existence seemed to correspond to the five pieces of the missing Key. Only two I could trace exactly the Wooden Pillar, which appeared on your planet, and the Silver Bail. It seems to be at some sort of party. We must go there to retrieve it before the Krikkit robots find it, or who knows what may hap?
No, said Ford firmly. We must go to the party in order to drink a lot and dance with girls.
But haven’t you understood everything I?…
Yes, said Ford, with a sudden and unexpected fierceness, I’ve understood it all perfectly well. That’s why I want to have as many drinks and dance with as many girls as possible while there are still any left. If everything you’ve shown us is True…
True? Of course it’s true.
–…then we don’t stand a whelk’s chance in a supernova.
A what? said Arthur sharply again. He had been following the conversation doggedly up to this point, and was keen not to lose the thread now.
A whelk’s chance in a supernova, repeated Ford without losing momentum. The…
What’s a whelk got to do with a supernova? said Arthur.
It doesn’t, said Ford levelly, stand a chance in one.
He paused to see if the matter was now cleared up. The freshly puzzled looks clambering across Arthur’s face told him that it wasn’t.
A supernova, said Ford as quickly and as clearly as he could, is a star which explodes at almost half the speed of light and burns with the brightness of a billion suns and then collapses as a super-heavy neutron star. It’s a star which burns up other stars, got it? Nothing stands a chance in a supernova.
I see, said Arthur.
The…
So why a whelk particularly?
Why not a whelk? Doesn’t matter.
Arthur accepted this, and Ford continued, picking up his early fierce momentum as best he could.
The point is, he said, that people like you and me, Slartibartfast, and Arthur particularly and especially Arthur are just dilletantes, eccentrics, layabouts, fartarounds if you like.
Slartibartfast frowned, partly in puzzlement and partly in umbrage. He started to speak.
–… is as far as he got.
We’re not obsessed by anything, you see, insisted Ford.
–…

“真实时间运动。我马上告诉你。我在那儿注意到，有五片离我们比较近的投弃物，似乎与钥匙的五个部分对得上号。我只能追踪到其中两个——木柱——出现在你的星球上，以及银横木，似乎在某个派对上。咱们得把它拿回来，赶在版求机器人之前。不然，谁知道会发生什么？”
“不。”福特坚决地说，“我们必须去参加派对，目的是大醉一场并和女孩们跳舞。”
“你还不明白吗？我……”
“是是，”福特突然很强硬地说道，“我明白得很。这正是为什么我要喝尽量多的酒，和尽量多的女孩跳舞，趁他们还有剩。如果你给我俩看的东西是真的的话……”
“真的？当然是真的。”
“那我们就连超新星上一个娥螺的成功机会都没有。”
“一个什么？”阿瑟插嘴问道，他一直顽强地努力理解那两人的对话，他不能让思路断在这儿。
“超新星上一个娥螺的机会。”福特重复了一遍，保持着强硬有力的语气。“那个……“
“一个娥螺和超新星有什么关系？”阿瑟问。
“一点都没。”福特冷冷地说，“没有机会产生关系。”
他停了停，看看自己说清楚没。可惜，阿瑟脸上懵懂迷惑的申请告诉他，他没说清楚。
“超新星，”福特尽最大努力说得又快又清晰，“是一种恒星，以几近光速一半的速度爆炸，以十亿个太阳的亮度燃烧，然后以超重中子星的形式坍缩。它是会烧掉其他星星的星，明白？超新星上什么都没机会。”
“懂了。”阿瑟说。
“那个……”
“那为什么是娥螺呢？”
“为什么不能是娥螺？这不重要。”
阿瑟接受了这一说法。福特于是继续，尽力拿出刚才那样强硬的语气。
“重点是，”他说，“像你、我、阿瑟——特别是阿瑟——这样的人，只是半吊子，怪人，二流子，蠢货——如果你愿意这么说的话。”
司拉提巴特法斯皱起眉头，一半因为迷惑，一半因为不悦。他想说点什么。
“……”他只能说出这个来。
“我们不为任何东西着魔。懂吗。”福特振振有辞。
“……”