经典科幻文学:《生命 宇宙及一切》第10章1

Chapter 10
The body of Arthur Dent span.
The Universe shattered into a million glittering fragments around it, and each particular shard span silently through the void, reflecting on its silver surface some single searing holocaust of fire and destruction.
And then the blackness behind the Universe exploded, and each particular piece of blackness was the furious smoke of hell.
And the nothingness behind the blackness behind the Universe erupted, and behind the nothingness behind the blackness behind the shattered Universe was at last the dark figure of an immense man speaking immense words.
These, then, said the figure, speaking from an immensely comfortable chair, were the Krikkit Wars, the greatest devastation ever visited upon our Galaxy. What you have experienced…
Slartibartfast floated past, waving.
It’s just a documentary, he called out. This is not a good bit. Terribly sorry, trying to find the rewind control…
–…is what billions of billions of innocent…
Do not, called out Slartibartfast floating past again, and fiddling furiously with the thing that he had stuck into the wall of the Room of Informational Illusions and which was in fact still stuck there, agree to buy anything at this point.
–…people, creatures, your fellow beings…
Music swelled again, it was immense music, immense chords. And behind the man, slowly, three tall pillars began to emerge out of the immensely swirling mist.
–…experienced, lived through or, more often, failed to live through. Think of that, my friends. And let us not forget and in just a moment I shall be able to suggest a way which will help us always to remember that before the Krikkit Wars, the Galaxy was that rare and wonderful thing a happy Galaxy!
The music was going bananas with immensity at this point.
A Happy Galaxy, my friends, as represented by the symbol of the Wikkit Gate!

第十章
阿瑟感到天旋地转。
宇宙迸裂为千万块闪亮的碎片，每一块碎片无声地穿过夜空，在它们银色的表面上，映出天火地劫之象。
宇宙背后的黑暗亦爆炸开来，每一块黑暗都是来自地狱的滚滚浓烟。
宇宙背后的黑暗的背后的虚无喷发了。迸裂的宇宙背后的黑暗背后的虚无背后，有一个庞然黑影，说着一些庞然大话。
“于是，这……”黑影坐在一张庞然舒适的椅子上，说道，“……便是版求战争，我们银河系所遭遇过的、最为严重的灾难。你所经历的……”
司拉提巴特法斯飘飘荡荡地出现在一边，招着手。
“这只是个资料片，”他喊着，“没什么意思。真的很抱歉，我在找倒带按钮……”
“……正是成亿成兆的、无辜的……”
“千万不要，”司拉提巴特法斯又飘过来了，恼怒地折腾那个刚才被他插进信息幻影室墙上的东西——此时仍然插在那儿，“答应买他说的什么东西。”
“……人们，造物们，你的同胞们……”
此时背景音乐骤然放大了音量，这是相当庞然的音乐，庞然的和声。在那个说话人的身后，渐渐地，从庞然的旋涡状雾气中，显现出三根高高的柱子。
“……所经历的，所撑过的——或者，更有可能是没撑过去的。想想看，朋友们。让我们永远不要忘记——我会马上提议一个让大家记住的方法——在版求战争之前，银河系是出类拔萃、无与伦比的美好，是一个快乐的银河系！”
音乐此时进入了庞然疯狂的状态。
“一个快乐的银河系，我的朋友们，它的象征，就是叁柱门 ！”