经典科幻文学:《宇宙尽头的餐馆》第16章3
“At the End of the Universe you have to use the past tense a lot,” said Zaphod, “’cos everything’s been done you know. Hi, guys,” he called out to a nearby party of giant iguana lifeforms, “How did you do?”
“Is that Zaphod Beeblebrox?” asked one iguana of another iguana.
“I think so,” replied the second iguana.
“Well doesn’t that just take the biscuit,” said the first iguana.
“Funny old thing, life,” said the second iguana.
“It’s what you make of it,” said the first and they lapsed back into silence. They were waiting for the greatest show in the Universe.
“Hey, Zaphod,” said Ford, grabbing for his arm and, on account of the third Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster, missing. He pointed a swaying finger.
“There’s an old mate of mine,” he said, “Hotblack Desiato! See the man at the platinum table with the platinum suit on?”
Zaphod tried to follow Ford’s finger with his eyes but it made him feel dizzy. Finally he saw.
“Oh yeah,” he said, then recognition came a moment later. “Hey,” he said, “did that guy ever make it megabig! Wow, bigger than the biggest thing ever. Other than me.”
“Who’s he supposed to be?” asked Trillian.
“Hotblack Desiato?” said Zaphod in astonishment, “you don’t know? You never heard of Disaster Area?”
“No,” said Trillian, who hadn’t.
“The biggest,” said Ford, “loudest…”
“Richest…” suggested Zaphod.
“… rock band in the history of…” he searched for the word.
“… history itself,” said Zaphod.
“No,” said Trillian.
“在宇宙尽头，你必须大量使用过去时态。”赞福德说，“你知道，因为每件事都已经过去了。嗨，伙计们，”他冲旁边的一伙活像巨型鬣蜥的生物打了个招呼，“过去近来过得怎么样？”
“这家伙是赞福德·毕博布鲁克斯吗，”一只鬣蜥问另外一只。
“我想是吧。”第二只鬣蜥回答说。
“那么，值得为这个吃块饼干。”第一只鬣蜥说。
“生活，真够怪的。”第二只鬣蜥说。
“怪也是你自己过出来的。”第一只说，然后他们便又恢复了沉默。他们在等待着宇宙中最壮观的表演。
“嘿，赞福德。”福特说，一边来抓他的胳膊。由于泛银河系含漱爆破药的作用，他有点儿迷糊了。他晃动着伸出一根手指：“那边有我的一个老相识，”他说，“霍特布莱克·迪西亚托！看见那边白金桌子旁那个穿铂灰色套装的人了吗？”
赞福德试图让自己的限腈跟随福特的指头，但这样做的结果却让他觉得头晕目眩。不过他最终还是看见了。
“噢，是的。”他说，又过丁一会儿，他才反应过来。
“嘿，”他说，“是那个超级大牌的家伙哇，比有史以来最大牌的人还要大牌，当然，除丁我以外。”
“这家伙是谁？”崔莉恩问。
“霍特布莱克·迪西亚托？”赞福德惊讶地反问道，“你不知道吗？难道你从来没有听说过‘灾难地带’？”
“没有。”崔莉恩说，她从来没听说过。
“最大牌的，”福特说，“虽吵闹的……”
“最赚钱的。”赞福德提醒说。
“……摇滚乐队，在音乐历史上……”他停下来寻找合适的词。
“在所史上。”赞福德纠正他。
“没听说过。”崔莉恩说。
