狄更斯双语小说:《董贝父子》第34章Part7

'So Alice Marwood was transported, mother,' she pursued, 'and was sent to learn her duty, where there was twenty times less duty, and more wickedness, and wrong, and infamy, than here. And Alice Marwood is come back a woman. Such a woman as she ought to be, after all this. In good time, there will be more solemnity, and more fine talk, and more strong arm, most likely, and there will be an end of her; but the gentlemen needn't be afraid of being thrown out of work. There's crowds of little wretches, boy and girl, growing up in any of the streets they live in, that'll keep them to it till they've made their fortunes.'
The old woman leaned her elbows on the table, and resting her face upon her two hands, made a show of being in great distress - or really was, perhaps.
'There! I have done, mother,' said the daughter, with a motion of her head, as if in dismissal of the subject. 'I have said enough. Don't let you and I talk of being dutiful, whatever we do. Your childhood was like mine, I suppose. So much the worse for both of us. I don't want to blame you, or to defend myself; why should I? That's all over long ago. But I am a woman - not a girl, now - and you and I needn't make a show of our history, like the gentlemen in the Court. We know all about it, well enough.'
Lost and degraded as she was, there was a beauty in her, both of face and form, which, even in its worst expression, could not but be recognised as such by anyone regarding her with the least attention. As she subsided into silence, and her face which had been harshly agitated, quieted down; while her dark eyes, fixed upon the fire, exchanged the reckless light that had animated them, for one that was softened by something like sorrow; there shone through all her wayworn misery and fatigue, a ray of the departed radiance of the fallen angel.'
Her mother, after watching her for some time without speaking, ventured to steal her withered hand a little nearer to her across the table; and finding that she permitted this, to touch her face, and smooth her hair. With the feeling, as it seemed, that the old woman was at least sincere in this show of interest, Alice made no movement to check her; so, advancing by degrees, she bound up her daughter's hair afresh, took off her wet shoes, if they deserved the name, spread something dry upon her shoulders, and hovered humbly about her, muttering to herself, as she recognised her old features and expression more and more.
'You are very poor, mother, I see,' said Alice, looking round, when she had sat thus for some time.
'Bitter poor, my deary,' replied the old woman.
She admired her daughter, and was afraid of her. Perhaps her admiration, such as it was, had originated long ago, when she first found anything that was beautiful appearing in the midst of the squalid fight of her existence. Perhaps her fear was referable, in some sort, to the retrospect she had so lately heard. Be this as it might, she stood, submissively and deferentially, before her child, and inclined her head, as if in a pitiful entreaty to be spared any further reproach.
'How have you lived?'
'By begging, my deary.
'And pilfering, mother?'
'Sometimes, Ally - in a very small way. I am old and timid. I have taken trifles from children now and then, my deary, but not often. I have tramped about the country, pet, and I know what I know. I have watched.'
'Watched?' returned the daughter, looking at her.

“艾丽斯?马伍德就这样被流放到海外，妈妈，”她继续说道，”被打发去学习履行她的责任；实际上那里却比这里使人二十倍地忘记自己的责任，那里比这里多二十倍的邪恶、堕落与丑行。艾丽斯?马伍德回来的时候已成了一个女人，一个经过这一切之后所应当成为的女人。到一定的时候，非常可能，她将会在更庄严的气氛中听到更漂亮的谈话，看到更有力的臂膀向她伸过来，她的末日也就将来临了；但是那些大人先生们不用害怕失业。就在他们所住的任何一条街道上，又有一大群可怜的男女孩子成长起来，所以他们又将有工作好做，直到发财致富为止。”
老太婆把胳膊肘支在桌子上，用两只手托着脸孔，装出一副十分痛苦的样子--或许真的很痛苦也说不定。
“好了，我讲完了，妈妈，”女儿摇了摇头，仿佛也结束了这个话题似地说道，”我已经说够了。不论我们做什么，你和我今后都别再谈什么尽责任的问题了。我想，你的童年也跟我的童年相似。那样对我们两人就更不好了。我不想责怪你，也不想为我自己辩护。我为什么要这样做呢？这是好久以前就已过去的事了。但是我现在是个女人，不是个女孩子了，你和我都用不着像法庭上的大人先生们那样去把我们的历史抖搂出来，我们对它一清二楚。”
她虽然已经堕落了，道德败坏了，但在她的脸孔与身姿中仍然有一种美丽；甚至在它表露得最不好的时候，对她最漠不关心的人也不能不觉察到。当她沉默下来、她先前十分激动的脸孔平静下来的时候，她凝视着炉火的乌黑的眼睛原先射出了不顾一切的眼光，现在已换成了某种类似忧虑而和缓下来的眼光；这时候一位堕落了的天使的曾经消失的光辉，通过她长途跋涉之后的痛苦与疲乏，照耀出来。
母亲默默无言地向她注视了一些时候之后，大胆地把满是皱纹的手向桌子对面她的身上悄悄伸过去；当她看到女儿允许她这样做的时候，就摸摸她的脸孔，把她的头发抚平。艾丽斯似乎感觉到老太婆这关怀的表示至少是真心诚意的，所以一动不动，没有去阻止她；老太婆得一步进一步，她把女儿的头发重新编扎起来，把它湿漉漉的鞋子（如果它们还可以称为鞋子的话）脱掉，在她肩上披上点什么干的东西，并低声下气地在她身边来回忙碌着；当她愈来愈多地认出她过去的一些特征和表情的时候，就嘟嘟囔囔地自言自语着。
“我看你很穷，妈妈，”艾丽斯这样坐了一些时候之后，向四下里看看，说道。
“穷得可怜，我的宝贝，”老太婆回答道。
她喜爱她的女儿，又怕她的女儿。也许她在好久以前就开始喜爱她了，那时候她正在为生活而进行屈辱的斗争的过程中，第一次注意到女儿的美貌。也许她的害怕跟她刚才听到的往事有些关系。不管怎样，现在她正顺顺从从、恭恭敬敬地站在女儿面前，低着头，仿佛在可怜地恳求她别再责备她。
“你是怎么生活的？”
“向别人讨钱，我的宝贝。”
“偷东西吗，妈妈？”
“有时候也偷，艾丽--偷得不多。我老了，胆子又小。有时候，我的宝贝，我从孩子们身上搞到些小东西，不过不经常。我在附近一带流浪漂泊，心肝，我知道了我所知道的事情。我一直在注意观察着。”
“注意观察着？”女儿看着她，问道。